Opt out or left out?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Opt out or left out?
430
Mon, 05-13-2013 - 3:31pm

This article says that most SAH moms do so, because they can't afford to work (i.e. couldn't make enough to cover their childcare costs).  Or that their husband's income is in the top 5% of earners in the US.  So SAHMs are at the two extreme ends of income.  This seems to me to be pretty much what we've found through discussions on this board.  Do you think that there should be programs in place to make it easier for SAHMs in the lower income brackets to go back to work?  How could this be accomplished?

http://www.nbcnews.com/business/opt-out-or-left-out-economics-stay-home-moms-1C9881635

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2013
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 2:46pm

You are making huge assuptions and looking very foolish in doing so, you clearly missed the point of this article.

Nope, the story did not go into detail so we basically have to ASSUME the whole thing. I get the point of the article. Since this was the only woman in the article, that is who I am concentrating the debate on.

I don't know what my line in the sand is, I haven't drawn it yet.  But that's not really the point of the article, programs for helping sahms go back to work if they wish was the point of the article.

And there was no answer, correct?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 2:56pm

bordwithyou wrote:
What if she does get pregnant again and her family helps out? How is that any of your concern?

How is it any of our concerns?  This is a private family matter as far as I can tell.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 2:58pm

<<You are making huge assuptions and looking very foolish in doing so, you clearly missed the point of this article.

Nope, the story did not go into detail so we basically have to ASSUME the whole thing. I get the point of the article. Since this was the only woman in the article, that is who I am concentrating the debate on.

No, we don't have to assume the whole thing, let alone shout our assumptions, it makes one look foolish to keep assuming things that are irrelevant to the point of discussion.  I don't think you get the point because your posts keep focusing on something different, your assumptions.

I don't know what my line in the sand is, I haven't drawn it yet.  But that's not really the point of the article, programs for helping sahms go back to work if they wish was the point of the article.

And there was no answer, correct?>>

It was a discussion point, not an answer.  Clearly, you missed the point.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2011
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 3:03pm

Spring, I've assumed that you're anti-welfare based on all of the anti-welfare statements you have made in this thread. Like when you said: << You don't mind that some people take advantage and use YOUR money to sit on their butts all day and just keep having kids? >>

<<It all depends on the family but there are PLENTY of families out there who can't have children who would LOVE to adopt one and CAN afford to raise them without any help.>>

While adoption can be an admiral and selfless choice, I doubt there are THAT many families willing to adopt considering that there are over 130,000 kids waiting to be adopted in the US right now. (Source

I was asking if the families like the one in the article should simply suffer along without any help at all. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2013
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 3:18pm

Spring, I've assumed that you're anti-welfare based on all of the anti-welfare statements you have made in this thread. Like when you said: << You don't mind that some people take advantage and use YOUR money to sit on their butts all day and just keep having kids? >>

ASSUMED. Welfare is not bad if it is used properly and in the way it was intended.

<<It all depends on the family but there are PLENTY of families out there who can't have children who would LOVE to adopt one and CAN afford to raise them without any help.>>

While adoption can be an admiral and selfless choice, I doubt there are THAT many families willing to adopt considering that there are over 130,000 kids waiting to be adopted in the US right now. (Source

Really? I have a friend who has been trying to adopt for years and it must not be THAT easy to adopt in the U.S. if the majority of people I know who HAVE adopted have done so out of the country. Others waited for so long for a baby in the U.S.

Did that statistic (which I am not sure where you got) deter your dsd to put her child up for adoption? 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 3:26pm

There's enough ASSumptions to go around spring, It's not just you, Lol.  And yea, Wouldn't it be nice to just write a check and adopt a kid in this country, No.  It's not that easy, In fact it's easier to abort than adopt which makes me sick.  There's a real dysfunction with welfare and those that can't see the forest through the trees. 

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2013
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 3:33pm

There's enough ASSumptions to go around spring, It's not just you, Lol.  And yea, Wouldn't it be nice to just write a check and adopt a kid in this country, No.  It's not that easy, In fact it's easier to abort than adopt which makes me sick.  There's a real dysfunction with welfare and those that can't see the forest through the trees. 

Yep, LOTS of assumptions. My view is soooo wide it is unbelievable. I don't think your views are narrow because you explain how YOU do things. I think it is narrow when you don't see that not everyone helps themselves and others have to pay the price in life because of it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 3:35pm
I've established boundaries already with my children but there's a difference b/w drawing lines in the sand about normal parenting issues and crisis like teen pregnancy and the like. I'm grateful we communicate and my worries would lie there than where hte heck I was going to draw a line if something so big happened.

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 3:43pm

<Wouldn't it be nice to just write a check and adopt a kid in this country>

As an adoptive mother, I am appalled at this statement.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2010
Tue, 05-14-2013 - 3:44pm

Spring==Yep, LOTS of assumptions. My view is soooo wide it is unbelievable. I don't think your views are narrow because you explain how YOU do things. I think it is narrow when you don't see that not everyone helps themselves and others have to pay the price in life because of it.</span></strong></span></p>[/quote]

Everyone on the planet knows that not everyone helps themselves, or is able to help themselves.  No one said that the others don't have to "pay the price" for giving money to your son/daughter/neice who need it.  (So I guess you are confused on that point).  They pay the money to them if they want to and that is the price.  You are the one who assumes that it's all bad for the givers and they are so put upon and upset over having to fork over money so their grandkids can eat, etc.

“Clearly," said Arthur,"you're an idiot- but you're our kind of idiot. Come on.” 
― Markus ZusakThe Book Thief

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