Parents and school involvement

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Parents and school involvement
2586
Thu, 08-23-2007 - 8:49am

My question stems from a personal experience. My middle child is starting kindergarten next week. I've become fairly close with one of my dd's friend's moms- this is her first child entering the school system. She WOH, I do not, plus I have experience with the school, so she's been calling me with questions and comments.

It started to go bad when she called to complain that the kindy orientation is during the day- when she is working. Then it led to complaints about the parents' read aloud program (when the kids are in library) and other opportunities for volunteerism in the school. I get that these things aren't convenient for her, but I'm getting annoyed with the complaining. How can the kids have an orientation at night when they go to school during the day? None of these events are mandatory for parents or kids. And plenty of activities are scheduled for evenings: Back to school night, the PTA picnic, etc.

She thinks because she can't participate, no one should be able to, apparently. Plenty of WOHP do show up for these things. I think she's being unrealistic if she thought she could put a couple of kids through school without ever taking a vacation day. Am I wrong? Am I missing something here?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 8:28am
She sounds like a great teacher. Teachers who go the extra mile are among the assets that distinguish the exceptional school from the average ones. I guess your DD won't be shuffled around to 3 different elementary schools!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 8:30am
That's been quite obvious, but I don't think that's the point of M24's continual questioning.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 8:37am

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I love that question. My jaw just keeps dropping open reading how some parents in this thread get their information about the schools! I cannot imagine harassing the Principal on a very frequent basis like some parents here do. I know the Principal has a lot more important things to do than speak every day with individual parents whose children are doing just fine. Unbelievable.

And for anyone to use that as a starting point to criticize your approach to your DD's education is just too laughable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 8:42am

Thanks for sharing. That must have been difficult. I too agree that there is no way I would constantly shuffle my children around from school to school as some parents do.

And agree too to the idea of fostering the friendships that bring out the good. I know a mom who recently has had to get very involved in doing that because her child's next door neighbor is simply becoming a bad and overbearing influence. I admire parents who go the extra mile to bring their children together with good friends after school hours, weekends, vacations, etc.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 8:51am

An equally good way to know who is teaching your children is to talk to your children. Your children seem to be valuable sources you repeatedly fail to mention in all of your information-gathering. Don't you talk to them every day about their teachers and what is going on at the schools?

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What problems led you to have your son in three different elementary schools?

Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 9:02am

INterestingly many top liberal arts colleges are no longer requireing SAT submissions -- here's an interesting article about Bates college in my own home state that did away with them, so has Bowdoin, Provindecne (where my brother went) and Holy Cross (where my sister and I went). Interesting trend to be sure and a boon for people like me who STINK at standardized testing LOL

http://www.usatoday.com/news/education/2004-10-01-sat_x.htm

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 9:04am

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Invaluable? That's a shame. I can't even imagine harassing our school's Principal "to keep abreast of what is going on in the school and what is coming up in the future." I'm glad the other parents at our school feel the same and let our Principal continue doing a job I think is a little more important than having daily chit-chat with parents who have no concerns or conflicts at the school.

Maybe you should take charge and start a regular newsletter at the school for students and parents. We have such a weekly newsletter. It includes a detailed and informative letter from the Principal, among other timely reports.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 9:37am

In the past, the SATs used to be a reliable predictor of how a student would perform in college. Now, the children go insane with overdoing the practice exams, hiring SAT tutors and taking SAT courses.

Like the article you linked said, minorities and children of working class parents will often not have scores reflective of their true abilities.

(I didn't want to dip a toe in the NCLB debate, but I do believe that for many, many students, performing up to their abilities on standardized testing is a learned skill. I don't know that NCLB standardized testing is such a bad thing, but perhaps a positive exposure and practice for those who will later take the SAT. JMHO.)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 12:13pm
To me and sorry if I insult anyone, which I am sure I will do, these sound like pushy parents. Most teachers and principals (or anyone else for that matter) do not like to deal with pushy parents and are probably saying in their head (Oh, no, here she/he comes again).
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Sat, 09-08-2007 - 12:15pm
ITA with you. I can't imagine putting my child in school for a couple of years, having her/him develop relationships with friends and then pull them away from them just to have to do it again and THEN pull them out of that school. I don't think this is benefiting the child one bit.

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