Parents and school involvement

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Parents and school involvement
2586
Thu, 08-23-2007 - 8:49am

My question stems from a personal experience. My middle child is starting kindergarten next week. I've become fairly close with one of my dd's friend's moms- this is her first child entering the school system. She WOH, I do not, plus I have experience with the school, so she's been calling me with questions and comments.

It started to go bad when she called to complain that the kindy orientation is during the day- when she is working. Then it led to complaints about the parents' read aloud program (when the kids are in library) and other opportunities for volunteerism in the school. I get that these things aren't convenient for her, but I'm getting annoyed with the complaining. How can the kids have an orientation at night when they go to school during the day? None of these events are mandatory for parents or kids. And plenty of activities are scheduled for evenings: Back to school night, the PTA picnic, etc.

She thinks because she can't participate, no one should be able to, apparently. Plenty of WOHP do show up for these things. I think she's being unrealistic if she thought she could put a couple of kids through school without ever taking a vacation day. Am I wrong? Am I missing something here?

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:03am
As we are seeing firsthand on this board!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:07am

Pssst, M24. You were mistaken all along. Read post # 1981 from Pumpkin:

<>

Clearly, "she" never felt or knew her parenting was being criticized - because it wasn't. So your defense was all for naught.




Edited 9/10/2007 6:08 am ET by sehorse
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:13am
See, that's what I find so unusual. I can imagine and even understand transferring a student to several elementary schools when the parents move house. What leaves me scratching my head is the parent who claims to research and investigate schools to the point of sitting in the back of classrooms yet, does not move house, but instead has shuttled the child from local school to other local schools.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:18am

I love the non-answer! You've been told you're doing it wrong, but apparently the poster (who did return to post yesterday) is unwilling to explain how!

Hazeleyes, you have to understand that you are way ahead in this debate because you live in an exceptional school district. It is the parent who is dissatisfied with the school district he has chosen to live in (and benefit from the lower taxes, of course) who has reason to complain and micro-manage even the bathroom breaks of important educators such as the teacher and Principal. Are you getting that now?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:20am
Who said striving for perfect attendance precludes staying home for illness?? That's kind of what "striving" includes. Oh, my.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:33am

See, that's where I think you're wrong. No one is being personally insulted nor criticized here. What is being discussed here - and criticized by me at least - is this strange phenomenon and approach by certain parents (several here, not just one) who feel they cannot possibly gather enough information about the curriculum, the daily goings-on at school, etc. by: 1.) speaking with their own children, 2.) by volunteering at school, 3.) by reading district-wide and school-wide letters and updates, 4.) by forming healthy and helpful friendships with the other parents at the school, 5.) by going to PTA and board meetings, etc.

Instead, they must be so out of the loop that things like "daily" communication with the Principal is apparently "invaluable" and information thus not available any other way. Another parent agrees and claims that monthly communication with a teacher is simply "not enough for me. There are other approaches too which are being criticized, but not individuals.

You work in the schools. Are most parents talking face-to-face with the Principals and teachers on a daily/more-than-once-a-month basis?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:48am

Exactly. It's kind of an insecure, pushy approach on the part of the parent. Our Principal is very protective of the teachers' free time periods and requires that parents either e-mail the teacher or schedule an appointment with the teacher for either before or after school. Parents are not allowed to roam the halls freely as in PKA's school(s):

http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-pssahwoh/?msg=17972.1590

Rather, when we volunteer, we have to sign in/out and go directly to the center we are volunteering in. Thankfully, parents are not allowed to "pop into" the classrooms. What unnecessary distractions for teacher and student.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:52am

You are doing a great job!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 09-10-2007 - 6:54am

Did you select your children's current school(s) based on how close they are to your job?

Do you really go inside the school for pick-up and drop-off?

Pages