Parents and school involvement

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Parents and school involvement
2586
Thu, 08-23-2007 - 8:49am

My question stems from a personal experience. My middle child is starting kindergarten next week. I've become fairly close with one of my dd's friend's moms- this is her first child entering the school system. She WOH, I do not, plus I have experience with the school, so she's been calling me with questions and comments.

It started to go bad when she called to complain that the kindy orientation is during the day- when she is working. Then it led to complaints about the parents' read aloud program (when the kids are in library) and other opportunities for volunteerism in the school. I get that these things aren't convenient for her, but I'm getting annoyed with the complaining. How can the kids have an orientation at night when they go to school during the day? None of these events are mandatory for parents or kids. And plenty of activities are scheduled for evenings: Back to school night, the PTA picnic, etc.

She thinks because she can't participate, no one should be able to, apparently. Plenty of WOHP do show up for these things. I think she's being unrealistic if she thought she could put a couple of kids through school without ever taking a vacation day. Am I wrong? Am I missing something here?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:39pm
Really? Why? Do YOU feel the same way? You must if you are defending her.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:40pm
Very true. The point is she does not know why he works late or even cares. That makes a solid marriage? She basically is only concerned if he comes home with a paycheck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:42pm

<<I think that children need more time with their parents than MOST working parents can give.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:51pm
Doesn't work that way at my job. Promotion is not based on what you do, it is who you know at my company. I don't ever expect to go any higher there and probably won't be there forever as the pay will never be "amazing" there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:52pm

because going to school is as much of a normal routine as going to the bathroom and playing outside is. all 3 examples are times away from parents but independent of sah/woh..and i read her additional words,in context,to read....

"..than most parents can give"

..meaning if one in that set can afford to sah,why wouldn't they. maybe you can answer that instead of challenging the word.




Edited 8/28/2007 1:04 pm ET by egd3blessed

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:52pm
Um, sounds dysfunctional to me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:55pm

Yes, I do know that as I told you before most everyone else at my job stays after 5pm. Do they have to, no and while at others jobs they might, not all do. I worked with a woman who did nothing all day but chat with all the workers and THEN decided to work at 5pm. Many of the people I work with do that and try to look good that they are there until 6pm or later. None of them advance so I don't see the point.

Do you think this is the only job I have ever had, or know family and friends with other jobs?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:59pm
Basically because it is convenient for me right now. I am getting a discount for daycare, close to home and schools and I really like the girls I work with. I have worked with for so many years and we work so well together. Am I not looking for a career. I am working to pay the bills and the job does that for me. I hold the medical, have stock and 401K.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 12:59pm
Maybe she just trusts that he is working later because she understands that is what he has to do? I also think you are reading more into her statement regarding his paycheck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Tue, 08-28-2007 - 1:01pm
Maybe. When someone says to me that they don't know why their dh works late or even cares, it kind of sounds odd to me. She has said as long as he brings home a paycheck. That sounds very cold to me. She also has "men and women" roles in their relationship which I find kind of weird too, so maybe it is just me??!!

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