Parents and school involvement

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Parents and school involvement
2586
Thu, 08-23-2007 - 8:49am

My question stems from a personal experience. My middle child is starting kindergarten next week. I've become fairly close with one of my dd's friend's moms- this is her first child entering the school system. She WOH, I do not, plus I have experience with the school, so she's been calling me with questions and comments.

It started to go bad when she called to complain that the kindy orientation is during the day- when she is working. Then it led to complaints about the parents' read aloud program (when the kids are in library) and other opportunities for volunteerism in the school. I get that these things aren't convenient for her, but I'm getting annoyed with the complaining. How can the kids have an orientation at night when they go to school during the day? None of these events are mandatory for parents or kids. And plenty of activities are scheduled for evenings: Back to school night, the PTA picnic, etc.

She thinks because she can't participate, no one should be able to, apparently. Plenty of WOHP do show up for these things. I think she's being unrealistic if she thought she could put a couple of kids through school without ever taking a vacation day. Am I wrong? Am I missing something here?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:06am

That's odd. If there's an emergency, the caller has to hope the teacher checks her voicemail?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:09am

You do realize that not all children of wohps are in before and/or afterschool care, don't you? Why would you ask PKA a personal question regarding this? Is it your intention to try to offend?(rhetorical question)

Your opinion isn't a substitute for facts.

Putting a child in daycare is universally better than keeping him/her at home with an abusive/neglectful parent.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:09am
But it's within your comfort level to drop kids off at a daycare for hours a day or utilize after-school care? Hours and days of othercare with providers you barely know are much better than an hour of childcare with providers you barely know. Got it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:10am
There is the option that a staff member could go to the classroom.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:11am
Exactly. It was an utterly ridiculous proposition to begin with.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:14am

Too old for camp?? My oldest , 9, begged me to keep her in all day camp b/c her and her friends put together a "club" and she was missing it in the afternoons. And she didn't even need to go to day camp but at ages 9 & 6 I felt they needed it a lttle this summer. They loved it!

Afterschool care? This is the first year I am using it 2-3 days a week for 45 minutes. They get to play with their friends ( a lot of kids use afterschool care) and start their homeworl. Both their best friends are in afterschool care. Yeah, they are going to be tortured.

Personally, I think that universally, dacayre, afterschool care and daycamp is way better for a child than sah with an abusive (and there are many forms of abuse) parent.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:17am

I would respond that you currently have a job.

I would also respond that both you and your husband have made it a priority to be SAHPs for almost a decade because you thought at the time that having a SAHP was better than having dual-WOHPs. In fact, you mentioned your DH was adamant that you have a SAHP for your child(ren) because he hated daycare so much.

Then I'd respond with a question as to why you've neglected to mention to Shari that your own DH has such strong feelings against daycare.

Did you disagree for almost 10 years that SAH was better than WOH but did it anyway? I would respond, I don't find that kind of thing healthy in a marriage.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:18am

How do YOu know she barely knows them?

The daycamp and afterschool care where my girls went and are going to this year are staffed by teachers and aides from their school and I know them well. Most of them live in the neighborhood and we go to the same pool all summer.

Your idea of WOHP's is soooo slanted. Where do you get this from?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:20am

Can you explain what you mean by "step-up"? What is being salaried a step-up from?

Just curious.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:22am
Where my dh works, salaried employees have better benefits than hourly employees.

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