Parents and school involvement

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Parents and school involvement
2586
Thu, 08-23-2007 - 8:49am

My question stems from a personal experience. My middle child is starting kindergarten next week. I've become fairly close with one of my dd's friend's moms- this is her first child entering the school system. She WOH, I do not, plus I have experience with the school, so she's been calling me with questions and comments.

It started to go bad when she called to complain that the kindy orientation is during the day- when she is working. Then it led to complaints about the parents' read aloud program (when the kids are in library) and other opportunities for volunteerism in the school. I get that these things aren't convenient for her, but I'm getting annoyed with the complaining. How can the kids have an orientation at night when they go to school during the day? None of these events are mandatory for parents or kids. And plenty of activities are scheduled for evenings: Back to school night, the PTA picnic, etc.

She thinks because she can't participate, no one should be able to, apparently. Plenty of WOHP do show up for these things. I think she's being unrealistic if she thought she could put a couple of kids through school without ever taking a vacation day. Am I wrong? Am I missing something here?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:32am

Shari, only a wohm can use the Choose-to-work-out-of-the-home (CTWOHM) label. Then it's okay and can actually be used to explain why I as a SAHM am unambitious or something, lol.

But you as a SAHM are apparently not permitted to discuss the CTwoh distinction. I think that is why Lois is describing it as "nasty" but I'm not sure.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:49am
IMO, one is never too old for camp. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 6:50am
Not odd at all, it prevents parents from calling all day long interupting classroom activities. If there is an emergency, the OFFICE can go through the intercom to that specific classroom.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 7:13am

I'm a sahm and it's my fault too that DH didn't have diaper or bath duty during the week. He did during the weekends though. If my DH only had a few hours at night with the children, I personally preferred they bond through play. Even after some practice, it always seemed to take DH much longer to change a diaper. I could do it and wash up much faster.

Also, while I didn't have family to help me during the diaper years (my youngest is now 4 yo), I hired regular babysitters during the work week to help me get my breaks in. It worked for us.

Avatar for 4thekids2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 7:19am

Not where my DH is. Hourly is union though so that probably makes a difference. He makes more money then his boss because of OT, he has better benefits and can't be fired at the drop of a hat.

Amy

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 7:28am

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Don't you know anyone who works in Manhattan? I guess there are a few such jobs, but many jobs in Manhattan are never going to be strictly 9 to 5. I'm just surprised because you apparently live near the end of the train line (IMO) and have seen the "miles and miles" of cars parked at the Ronkonkoma station? How can you not know that there are many people who don't have a 9 to 5 job?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 7:31am
Why is it your fault?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 7:31am
I kind of understand what you're saying. I've never known a spouse ~ or even an employee for that matter ~ being able to decide that work will now end at 5 pm instead of 6 pm. That's unusual.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 7:31am

But she made the statement that she does not know why is is there. If she knows that he is there because he needs to be then she does know why he is there.

I really do not think she has no idea and does not care why her DH works long hours but that is the statement she made. So that is the statment being debated.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 08-29-2007 - 7:33am
Would you be disappointed if he stopped bringing home a paycheck? You said Shari is only concerned that her DH brings home a paycheck. Well, I think that can happen in dual-wohp households too. There, both spouses can fairly expect the other to continue to bring home a paycheck.

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