Paternity Leave

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Paternity Leave
23
Thu, 04-03-2014 - 7:14pm

Big news on sports radio today seems to be about the fact that New York Mets 2nd baseman Daniel Murphy has chosen to take the three days alloted to him under his contract for maternity leave.

Some of the comments being made are about the fact that they should have induced labor prior to the season starting.  why does he have to be there he cannot breast feed and what is he going to do hold her hand for three days.

Thankfully not all commentators are being jerks and he is getting some support for his decision.

Stilll a double standard on the importance of father and also I think of husbands.   While paternity leave was not an opton for DH he did take up to two weeks of regular leave with the birth of each of our DDs and I am so glad that he did. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2013
Fri, 04-04-2014 - 5:59pm

I don't even understand it.  His CLUB didn't mind and MLB allows players to miss up to 3 games for such events, so THEY don't mind.  And he came back EARLY (after missing only 2 games).  It's a 160 (one hundred and SIXTY) game season for heaven's sake!!  This isn't going to break the season for him, for them....for anyone.  It's his child. And while I know I'm blaspheming here for the baseball fans, it's just a game.  :D

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2013
Fri, 04-04-2014 - 7:07pm

I remember back in the late 70s when watching a game and Steve Garvey was being called a dedicated player for being at the game even though his wife had a baby that morning.  I think it was the All Star Game.  

I guess that just showed you how dedicated he was to his wife and marriage with his wife leaving him and him having many affairs on other women. lol

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Fri, 04-04-2014 - 7:12pm

blackandwhitemolly wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:medium">I remember back in the late 70s when watching a game and Steve Garvey was being called a dedicated player for being at the game even though his wife had a baby that morning.  I think it was the All Star Game.  </span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:small"><span>I guess that just showed you how dedicated he was to his wife and marriage with his wife leaving him and him having many affairs on other women. lol</span></span></strong></p>

Yes,  his baseballl nickname of "Mr' Clean" did not end up being true. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2013
Fri, 04-04-2014 - 7:17pm

Yep, Empty 

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Sun, 04-06-2014 - 11:07am

Not all fathers are baseball players, Lol and I can see the controversy but at the same time commend his choice.   I have to wonder - based on what you write and others about taking full paternity leave - how common taking full leaves are, With each one of my babies DH didn't take off more than a few days, I'd have to ask if that's related to boredom or the needs and demands of his work, or a combination of both perhaps. Moreover, Having the ability to stay at home or/and utilize a full maternity leave yourself is a rewarding benefit for any newborn.   I have a guy friend whose wife just had a baby, He took some time off but not as much maternity time as she was allowed and took full advantage of, I think what works for them is a schedule, he bonds a lot at night. 

 

 

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Sun, 04-06-2014 - 11:12am

savcal2011 wrote:
<p>Men are eejits.  Except Murphy. He's a good guy.  lol</p><p>Xh took several weeks with each kid. Not all at once, but a week right away, a week later, adn then I think a week when I went back to work.  It was paid as annual leave, but covered under FMLA.</p><p>Birth mothers obviously need more time - or it's more important - because they have their own medical recovery.  But it's just as vital and crucial that men bond with their children.  Not only crucial for that family, but for society. </p>

Yes, Bonding is as critical for fathers as for mothers.  I'd hope your kids, esp your son, still gets that with their dad. 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sun, 04-06-2014 - 12:24pm
We offer a semester of altered assignment to either new fathers or new mothers on the faculty. I can't remember anyone ever turning it down. One of my colleagues is on his fifth altered assignment in ten years.
Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Sun, 04-06-2014 - 1:37pm
In Denmark it is the norm for fathers to take the leave allowed or something close to it. It is also the norm for both parents to work, so typically neither parent has a "more important" reason not to take care of the kids.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Sun, 04-06-2014 - 1:52pm

I have read that in the U.S. it is fairly common for people not to take all of the their regular vacaton time and I also think that it is true that in the few companies that actually have actual paternity time it common for the employers not to take full advantage of it. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Sun, 04-06-2014 - 2:42pm

grapthars_hammer wrote:
<p>I don't even understand it.  His CLUB didn't mind and MLB allows players to miss up to 3 games for such events, so THEY don't mind.  And he came back EARLY (after missing only 2 games).  It's a 160 (one hundred and SIXTY) game season for heaven's sake!!  This isn't going to break the season for him, for them....for anyone.  It's his child. And while I know I'm blaspheming here for the baseball fans, it's just a game.  :D</p>

I'm a big baseball fan and I totally agree with you.

PumpkinAngel