Practical or Philosophical?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Practical or Philosophical?
25
Mon, 06-30-2008 - 12:24pm

Is your current work status (woh, sah, everything in between) because of practical reasons or philosophical reasons? Or a mixture of both?

What are they? Have they changed as your children have grown?

How much time did you and your partner take to make each of your work status decisions?

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 07-02-2008 - 8:47am

wow.

 

Avatar for 4thekids2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 07-02-2008 - 3:56pm

Literally from the age of about 2 on I said I wnated 6 kids, from 12 on I said I wanted 5 boys and 1 girl.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2006
Wed, 07-09-2008 - 7:16am

I'm not entirely sure if/where I fit into this debate. I am a FT WOHM, but I am the non custodial parent. I am not remarried, but SO and I live together.

"Is your current work status (woh, sah, everything in between) because of practical reasons or philosophical reasons? Or a mixture of both?"

A mixture of both. Practical because I really have no other option, and philosophical because I am hard pressed to think of any circumstance where I or SO would feel compelled to support the other financially. In addition, DD is not his child, and he has no obligation to support her financially. That is my job. And given that I have a child to support, will most likely have to support my parents to at least some degree later on, and have considerable medical expenses of my own, I will not and cannot support him either.

"What are they? Have they changed as your children have grown?"

I have FT WOH for most of DD's life. The only time I didn't was for a couple of years when she was 2-4 yo. But I was not so much a SAHM as I was a SAH mental patient who was barely even capable of parenting. She stayed with her grandparents for a lot of it.

"How much time did you and your partner take to make each of your work status decisions?"

None whatsoever. He had no interest in supporting me/DD and I had no interest in letting him. We live together and co-own a fish tank. Beyond that we have completely separate finances. Seeing how difficult it is for us to even agree on matters concerning the apartment and the fish tank (if I had a dollar for everytime I have heard or said "It's half mine!", well you know the rest), I think it's best if we keep it the way it is.

Meez 3D avatar avatars games
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2008
Wed, 07-09-2008 - 3:13pm

As a teacher, my choice to work is philosophical.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Wed, 07-09-2008 - 5:59pm

Is your current work status (woh, sah, everything in between) because of practical reasons or philosophical reasons? Or a mixture of both?


They were mostly practical, but early on, there were some philosophical reasons.


What are they? Have they changed as your children have grown?


DH has always had a job that demanded a lot of travel and many hours. My job also required some travel, and some inconsistent hours. It was hard to manage this and still have family time when the kids were little. Neither one of us had a very flexible schedule. We would go for a week without having a real conversation, and it was very hard on our marriage.


When my second child was a newborn, we had a traumatic death in the family that made me want to reconsider how I spent my time, what I valued, etc., so when DH was asked to move to another state a

Pages