Rock and a Hard Place

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Rock and a Hard Place
1524
Thu, 11-20-2003 - 10:45am

There's something on this board that has been bothering me, and I hope I can articulate it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 8:38pm
And it is sooo true. It is a true trap. I get accused all the time of crying *conspiracy theory*, but the reality is that when it comes to personal finances, there is a conspiracy out there - by the governments and banks - to get our money. Qualifying for a mortgage is one of the biggest ones. The general public think that if you are spending 30% of your income on your mortgage payment you can afford it! If people would stop listening to the bankers and start listening to financial gurus, most people can grow considerable wealth with much less effort.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 8:44pm
Absolutely! I just attended a math seminar and learned that one of the biggest mistakes made with young children today is introducing computers to the pre-schooler. I was quite devastated to hear it because my ds has been *surfing* since he was 18 months old, but apparently even educational activities on a computer changes the way the young child's brain is wired. I guess there won't be any substantiative data until this generation is grown, but they are already finding more and more children needing glasses by early elementary school - which is one of the symptoms. Apparently, young children need to be outdoors and in open spaces to adequately develop their peripheral vision - staring a television and/or computer screen does not help the process. In the very near future we will see the recommended age for introducing computers to be 7 or older. The folks who put on this seminar are very active in getting computers out of classrooms until Grade 3 or 4. Very interesting stuff.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 8:48pm
<<>>

As a financial advisor, I do advocate living on one income - or being able to that is. Relying on 2 incomes is what gets many people into trouble. Adequate insurance to cover disaster is another thing that I advocate. If 2 income families can adjust to living on one income, they will most certainly build and accumulate wealth. I strongly advocate for living far beneath one's means.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 9:46pm
LOL - hard to trust your eyes when we're on the same side?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 10:23pm
Maybe that was it!
Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 10:36pm
My point is that you can't say it's better for kids if mom works. What would the point of my friends going to work when their DH's salaries provide everything they need and more? Their SES is high enough. All it would be is extra income, time away from their kids and having to pay someone else to care for them.

Personally, I don't think my income would put us into a higher tax bracket. We have a great house, two new cars and everything the kids need at this point. I just don't see how it would benefit my kids for me to go to work every day and to put them in the care of another full time.

Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 11-24-2003 - 10:40pm
How convenient. No response. nt
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 5:21am
Why kids are entering k without basic knowledge of books, I have no idea but I just had parent teacher conferences with my little one's teacher and the same trend is seen this year as was three years ago when her sister came through. However, this is not a lower middle class neighborhood. It would be between middle and upper closer to middle. The only thing I can guess is it has to do with education levels of parents. This is a blue collar town. There is a link between maternal education and the amount a pre-school child is read to.

What difference does it make what other parents do in my neighborhood? What matters is what I give my children not that some other mother doesn't read to her kids enough. My kids didn't even meet these non readers until they started kindergarten and then only saw them in school. Sorry, but I don't see what they have to do with my kids. This is a reflection on those mothers, not the schools or my kids. Both of my kids were at the top of the class, actually, dd#2 is the top of the class, with regard to reading readiness. Why some other child isn't, you'll have to take up with their mother.

As I have said, the schools are good here, the neighborhood safe, the parks usable and the city provides a lot in the way of enrichment activities. All of that has nothing to do with my neighbors not reading enough to their kids. All in all, this is a pretty desirable place to live. So much so that they're building McMansions on main boulevards and small interior lots. Sorry, but I don't see what whether or not another parent feels reading to pre-schoolers has to do with my SES. Is how much you read to a child now a determinant of SES? It would have to be for you to proclaim that I live in a lower class neighborhood based on the fact that many kids enter k having little in the way of knowledge about books.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 5:24am
Well you'd better call the authorities on me and dss#2. Both of us have turned our back for a second and had a toddler wander through the gate. While I agree the objective should be to never take your eyes off of a toddler, things happen that can distract you and it's not cause to call social services and have a child removed from a home. Dh was watching dd#1 in the back yard when he took a call regarding his father being in the hospital. Next thing you know, a neighbor was bringing her back as she had wandered trhough the gate while her dad was distracted. I once lost her in a department store when she decided it would be fun to duck into a clothes rack and play hide and seek. They had to lock down the store until she was found. I guess we're just unfit parents.


Edited 11/25/2003 5:25:57 AM ET by cyndiluwhoagain
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 11-25-2003 - 5:25am
and why is this an either/or? Am i the only one here that sees that BOTH have value and BOTH have their place? There is nothing wrong with computers -- when used in MODERATION. I always limited my children's "electronic time" (tv, computers, gameboy) to about 30 min-1 hr. per day. How in the world does that time supercede all of the "other" stuff? Additionally, the rules for usage include late afternoon and after homework is done.

eileen

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