Rock and a Hard Place

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Rock and a Hard Place
1524
Thu, 11-20-2003 - 10:45am

There's something on this board that has been bothering me, and I hope I can articulate it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 3:17pm

It could just mean that your child could be the only one reading at this point.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 3:28pm

Right as parents we tend to compare our children, its unavoidable.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 3:32pm
You are clearly one of those people who can't get beyond their own biases. I have said repeatedly that I do not place the responsibility of educating my children on the school. However, I no more take responsibility for my child's apptitude in academics than I would if he had a natural talent in music. My parenting, whether effective or not, has no bearing in his natural abilities. I see no value in comparing children because each is an individual. I see value in the use of IPPs (Individual Program Plans)which is why children who attend private institutions fare so much better than public schooled children. Because I do not have access to a private school in my area, I am sending my children to public school where the system caters to the average student. I suppose if your child is average, that is well and good, but when a child is at either end of average, they do not fare well in that competetive atmosphere. I am in favor of children being encouraged to compete against themselves - to learn and grow and to achieve to their potential. I am opposed with the notion that comparing child A to child B has any bearing on either child A or B, and in fact does nothing more than allow parents to use their children in a *parenting* competition that has no basis in reality.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 3:33pm
What a load of bull you are packing. The saddest part is that you seem to actually believe it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 3:36pm
And then she gossiped about what she observed with you. Yes, yes I know it wasn't gossip. She was trying to reassure you that your child was fine in dc. Kind of a moot point though huh when she was showing you the chart with your child at the top. Wonder why she thought you might have needed reassurance. Puzzling...
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 3:39pm

Comparison to a small sample as classroom is not accurate.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 3:42pm
Because they are being used as your measure of how you are doing as a parent.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 5:24pm
Keep telling yourself that. Who knows, you might actually find someone who will believe this crap.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 5:56pm
What a great big pile of hooey! You actually believe that by monitoring your child against her classmates that you'll have an accurate picture of HER progress? Where is the logic? Especially by making this comparison in K to children whom you claim are at a huge disadvantage. I guess if all you care about is that your child scores higher than her classmates, you'll get what you want - well maybe, if you keep comparing her to kids who don't even know what a book is. But if you want to accurately assess your own child's progress, you'd best be taking a greater interest than the class average or how billy is doing compared to sally. I would never place so much faith in any teacher, much less that poor excuse for a teacher your poor dd got stuck with! A far wiser move would be to pay attention to your child. To provide learning opportunities at home and measure her progress yourself. Jeez, you can do that simply by taking her to the library and reading together. Surely you'd be able to notice if her reading is improving? Then you provide more challenging reading material. It aint rocket science and I would think a lady as knowledgeable about brain development as you would be able to monitor your own child's progress!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 11-27-2003 - 6:01pm
She has one follower - Opinion123 is right behind her swallowing it all hook line and sinker. And they are probably wiser than leading experts in brain development, so maybe we should all reconsider our position. Maybe it does mean I'm the better parent if my child scores higher than children who have been neglected and don't even know what a book is. And maybe if I can convince the teacher to chart each child's abilities, I'll get an even clearer picture of my child's progress next year... and of course nip any problems right in the bud. Surely that chart will identify problems? I mean if my child falls behind suzy there must be a problem right?

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