Rock and a Hard Place

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Rock and a Hard Place
1524
Thu, 11-20-2003 - 10:45am

There's something on this board that has been bothering me, and I hope I can articulate it.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 6:37pm
Actually, yes. I've always thought my dd was bright but I also always thought she wasn't too far ahead of her peers. It was a bit of a surprise to see that there was no one else up there with her and that that is true across the board.

For extra work, the teacher has my dd write stories for her while the other kids write their letters and words. Dd, habitually, tries to turn in a single sentence and the teacher will send her back to write more as dd can produce a single sentence in about 5 seconds. The teacher has her read to the other kids to get more practice reading and dd shows them how to use the computer in the classroom. The teacher is going to start giving dd some extra computer work more on her level during the times she's working with the other kids on more basic stuff. She does the same math as the other kids in school, which is pretty much fun and games stuff at this level but is doing double digit mixed addition/subtraction work sheets at home.

Socially, dd does just fine. This group is too young for dd being smarter than the other kids to have any real negative effect but as is common of bright kids, dd has a lot of empathy, which, unfortunately, does result in her dummying herself down to fit the group. For example, her best friend can't do subtraction yet. Dd won't tell her she can do it until she can. She doesn't say it's to spare Cassie's feelings but I know that's it is. She just says that we won't tell Cassie she can do subtraction because she can't do it yet.

However, all of this has to be taken with a grain of salt right now as kids do a lot of catching up in the first 4 years of school. It is entirely possible that dd will start to slip down from her perch over the next couple of years. Class comparisons help to see if that is happening. Just because she's fast out of the gate doesn't mean she'll be fast to the finish line, though this is the second time she's out paced her peers by a mile so it is looking like this could be a lifelong trend.

She was fast out of the gate as a baby and head and shoulders above her peers by the time she was 3 only to have them start to catch up with her by age 5 but then she took off again. In the last three months she's gone from reading by rote to reading 1st grade books she's never seen before, writing lists of words to writing whole sentences and from counting objects to double digit addition/subtraction but if history repeats itself, she'll slow down after this spurt and her peers will start to catch up. However, her last spurt did last pretty much the first three years of her life so this could be a problem that needs to be dealt with. We'll start by seeing if she's still stands alone at the top of the class in 1st grde.

She's going to be tested to find out if she's gifted next summer. If she is, she'll go to a school for gifted kids and that will solve any social issues. If she's not, I'm not sure what we're going to do since her learning style is so different than her peers. She, basically, digs in and learns things at an extremely rapid pace then slows down and is quite content to just practice what she's learned for a while. If history repeats itself, she'll get to a certain level and then stall for a while and then take off again. Her ability to dummy herself down and blend into the group is of concern but her teacher knows what she's dealing with and my dd is not the first bright child she has taught.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 6:38pm

It's one thing to say your child is at the top of the class, in the middle, or at the bottom.....it's a totally different thing whip out a chart of the class

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 6:41pm
Boring her with the easier work her classmates are doing would accomplish nothing for dd. The teacher is giving her work more on her level and expecting more of her because she can deliver. The teacher will ask her if that's all she can write about whatever they're supposed to be writing about and dd will think about it and go back and write a few more sentences before turning in her paper. Giving my dd the same work the other kids are doing would only end up in my dd being bored and causing trouble. Trust me, I know from experience that this child is trouble when bored. Left to her own accord she WILL find something very interesting to do and it very likely won't be anything an adult would want her doing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 6:55pm
Oh my goodness! Look at us right on the same page all through an entire loooong thread! Almost scary isn't it? LOL
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 7:00pm
Yep but I think I have good company.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 7:02pm
Why is it unprofessional for her to say what she sees? She didn't print it in the school newspaper. She told me because my dd is one of the dc kids. There is nothing unprofessional about relaying your observations. I'm glad to hear that the dc kids rank high on school readiness.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 7:05pm
By 4th grade, it gets pretty hard to tell who was reading when they entered k and who didn't know the alphabet. Often when a child starts school reading, all that happens is their peers catch up over the next few years. I don't think this is of any real concern. Most kids will embrace learning in a school environment regardless of what they were/were not taught pre-school. If support at home is bad enough, then yes it will affect school performance and behavior but you're always going to have that faction in any school. I don't think most kids come from bad environments just because they never learned about books preschool.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 7:07pm
Huh?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 7:09pm
Sometimes it does. I've known for some time my dd is bright but I didn't realize how far ahead of the rest of the pack she is until I saw the charts.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Fri, 11-28-2003 - 7:10pm
I have to tell you this is the most bizzare stuff I have ever heard wrt advanced children. A teacher who has taught bright kids before first of all would not wait til summer to have testing completed. The use of the comparison chart she so nicely shared with you, would be totally useless. If your dd is adding and subtracting double digit numbers, writing stories, reading to the other children - please explain why she needed to graph those differences. It is stupid. And so is she if this is all true.

My ds is in K, he is reading in English at a grade 2/3 level, but is in French Immersion. He knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that the other children don't read. Clearly your dd's classmates are aware of that too if she is reading to them. The teacher using her as a teacher is an absolute outrage, but that aside, you said that your dd dummys down to their level... by reading to them? by being the teacher's assistant? Kind of contradictory don't ya think? It is very strange that 5 y/os in your area and mine are so different. My 5 y/o is definately ahead (right now)and none of the kids, including him, give a hoot! When his little buddy who doesn't know his letters yet can't write his name on his drawing, my ds writes it for him to copy. His friend says "thanks" and copies it. Then they move on. If your dd is *dummying down* to her peers now, you are going to have huge problems later on. With each of your posts, I am increasingly dumbfounded by why on earth you require these comparison charts (other than for boasting material)given how far advanced your dd is. Actually, I'm calling BS on this one.

Pages