SAH doesn't support change,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
SAH doesn't support change,
3723
Sat, 08-26-2006 - 4:58pm

"SAH doesn't support change, it supports going backwards to the 1950's,"

Statement in a post below.

I wholeheartedly disagree. To me, SAH is a choice. How is that going back to the 1950s, when a lot of women didn't have much of a choice.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 6:41pm
Uh no it doesn't. What are you going to do about the kids who need motivation along the way? The ones that need that extra little nudge in order to be qualified for the big trophy simply do not deserve the big trophy?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 6:50pm

You have made the assertion that reading programs that give prizes "train" kids to only read for the prize because of <> She doesn 't need the prize but it makes it meaningful to get a prize because it does make her feel good that the school acknowledges her hard work. She would still read but she also feels proud that others feel that her accomplishment is worth acknowledging.

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This is a fundamental difference between us then. I love the fact that my son has the opportunity to read for awards because otherwise he wouldn't read. Having a love of reading, IMO, isn't something to be taught. Kind of like teaching a love of anything else. Kids either have it or they don't. I would do anything to keep my kids reading and if that means rewarding them periodically, that is fine with me. As I said earlier, my DS has ADD and there is no way he would sit and read a book without getting something out of it. He simply doesn't have it in his personality to sit for any length of time to read a book

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 6:57pm
I am doing the general "you" I guess. I wasn't thinking of your kids any more than you were thinking of mine. You have implied though that it would be better for kids to not read at all instead of reading for prizes. If you haven't and I am simply reading to much into it and you meant only your kids, I apologize. I have to admit that I get a little defensive when people accuse me of doing something negative when my kids are concerned. If we are both getting the same result, what difference does it make which route we take to get there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 7:03pm

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Not by us. The awards are given when the child has earned it. Sure, for some of the awards there is a deadline (DS has to get 15 reading points by October 15 for his swimming party)but the majority of them they receive only if and when they reach the goal.

I have been using the pizza coupons as only one small example. My kids don't even participate in the pizza coupon program. They don't like pizza and it isn't challenging enough to motivate them. My kids' teachers have many more interesting challenges for them that they participate in at school. That doesn't mean that I think that those coupons are a bad thing. Some kids are not going to receive the same types of awards my kids receive so I am glad that the teachers have those smaller awards for those kids.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 7:09pm

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What if your child wanted to participate in the pizza coupon program? You wouldn't let him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 7:12pm
To each their own I guess. I have seen to many of the teachers that I work with struggle with parents and students because the parents see fit to take their kids out whenever they want to think that it is a good thing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 7:24pm
There has simply not been anything offered to any of my kids that has been a challenge for them. There simply hasn't been anything offered to them that they haven't mastered extremely easily. Since they know the material, they are not that motivated to spend a whole lot of time working on it. They could just get through it as fast as they can and do just the minimum to show their teacher that they do actually know what they are doing. But since they do more work than their peers, yes, they want recognition for it. It is difficult to tell 9 and 7 year old boys that they have to do way more work than their peers without getting something to show for it. My boys doesn't get to participate in some of the activities that other kids in their classes get to participate in because they are in the TAG classes. If they didn't get some kind of recognition for the work that they do, they simply would not do it because they would rather be with their peers. I want them to be challenged so I have them in TAG and yes, I am glad that their teachers recognize the sacrifices they make. They miss out on interaction with a large group of their friends and yes I want them to get something out of it. Something that they can be proud of, something that they can say "I earned this". It is not your place to diminish the pride they have for earning those awards. If you don't want your child to have that, fine. But you do NOT get to tell me that my children are being harmed because they get a sense of pride from the work they do and that it has been acknowledged by their teacher.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 7:28pm
And if there isn't a class that is challenging for them? If all of their classes are easy for them I am not allowed to want them to have something to keep them interested in still doing the work? My kids simply do not have any hard classes and if they didn't have some type of award to work toward, they simply would be too bored to keep with it. I don't need to motivate them to keep working to master the skill, I need to motivate them to keep at it AFTER they have mastered the skill. That is where the awards come in.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 7:36pm

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That is the way that it is set up by us also. All the students grades are on parent-access website and progress are reports are available. We have parent teacher conferences and the biggest complaint I hear from teachers is that parents don't take advantage of those conferences.

I have a very good idea where my kids are also. I don't need the awards they receive for that - I know where they are. My kids like the awards because it keeps them at the level they are. They are involved in the TAG program and since they miss out on a lot of the day to day interaction of their peers, the teachers use awards as a recognition of the sacrifice they make for that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Fri, 09-22-2006 - 7:40pm

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Your kids expect to get a computer and cell phone?? My kids will get one of those if they earn it.

The kids in our high school go on these kind of trips quite often - I can't wait until my kids get the chance to do it. This year a group is going to Italy, I am strongly considering being a chaperone ;)

BTW, did you notice we reached the 3000 mark ;)

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