SAH doesn't support change,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
SAH doesn't support change,
3723
Sat, 08-26-2006 - 4:58pm

"SAH doesn't support change, it supports going backwards to the 1950's,"

Statement in a post below.

I wholeheartedly disagree. To me, SAH is a choice. How is that going back to the 1950s, when a lot of women didn't have much of a choice.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2003
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:46pm
Here too...the VAST majority of candy goes in the trash....however the costumes are used for MONTHS afterwards in the games they play.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:50pm
Well, since there are rewards for everything for all his life, I don't think I will have to worry about that. In HS, he will work for the A or the perfect 4.0 (did you know that kids are now working towards 5.0s. Not sure how that is possible but one kid in our HS is awful close...), then he will work towards scholarships etc for college, then he will work towards salaries and bonuses in his career. They do plenty without working toward awards - we don't do allowances but they are still expected to help out around the house, they have to complete Bible work and they don't get any awards for that, they help out at DH's business without getting any kind of payment, they help their great-grandma do her yard work and house work.... My kids are fine and well adjusted, you don't need to concern yourself over them.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2006
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:52pm
That's the problem; we have no existing plan.

Sabina

Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:52pm

You just said you had a cake at the party and that they got candy at Halloween. How can you deny some sort of association? Nobody, nobody, nobody, said anything about food being the only thing, the highest priority, etc.

For my kids, Thursday is associated with taking the trash out to the curb on the way to schopl. Every Thursday they have to do that. Does that mean that Thursday is "about" trash, or that the most important thing that happens on Thursday is that they drag the trash to the curb? Of course not. Same with food and holidays. They are associated in kids' minds because they happen together, and for many kids, including mine, the holiday is the only time they normally eat certain foods. But the food isn't the only thing or the most important thing, by any means. I don't know why this is hard for you to understand.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:53pm
They get challenging tasks, they have to work hard to master those tasks, they master the task in the time frame given them by their teacher, they get the specified award. You mean when my child came running in the house after school on Friday overjoyed that he has reached the level in his reading program to qualify for the swimming party that he wasn't really happy? Boy, he sure fooled all of us then.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:57pm
No they are not the only ones and the funds are simply not available for any more programs for those kids at school. The school that my kids go to is always one of the top in the state for every program available - academic, music, athletics, drama, etc, etc and my kids participate in all of them. They are doing just fine. Like I said earlier, you simply don't have enough information to make the kind of statements you are making and you shouldn't worry about my kids - they are happy and doing just fine.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:57pm

Thanksgiving is ALL about the food. It is a harvest festival. Celebrating food, eating food, thanking for food!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:58pm
My children do not associate or expect those things on those specific days. If they had no candy and no cake on those days it wouldn't bother them. Didn't you say that you bake cookies on certain holidays and your children expect that? Food is not linked to holidays for them. My children would not crumble to pieces if they didn't have a cake on their birthday.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 3:58pm
Well then. If your kids are doing so well, it should be NO PROBLEM to explain to the 9 year old why he has to do more work than his classmates without some kind of extra award. Maybe he could read the parable of the talents, for instance, and you could tell him that "to whom much is given, much is expected." Or perhaps, "freely you were given, now freely give." I think he'd pick it up pretty quickly, actually.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:02pm
No need to worry. There are plenty of creative teaching methods at my kids' school. They just simply catch on sooner than most of the other kids in their class so for the period of time it takes the others to catch on, they may be bored. Few days at tops. That is when the teachers let them have their own free time (not just my kids, other kids in the same situation). DS has notepads FULL of drawings, plays, short stories, comic strips. He loves art and anything creative in that sense and his teacher lets him develop that on his own. His KLUE group is actually presenting one of the plays he wrote to the rest of the elementary school in the end of October. Don't worry about my kids, we are doing everything that has been recommended to us by multiple sources and we are having great results.

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