SAH doesn't support change,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
SAH doesn't support change,
3723
Sat, 08-26-2006 - 4:58pm

"SAH doesn't support change, it supports going backwards to the 1950's,"

Statement in a post below.

I wholeheartedly disagree. To me, SAH is a choice. How is that going back to the 1950s, when a lot of women didn't have much of a choice.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:02pm
I think that is how it works. I was just wondering though what goes into ginving a damn in order to ensure no illnesses happen?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:03pm
I thought you said your children weren't challenged at school. Now you say they are. I also thought you sad that the "rewards" at your kids' schools were things like getting to color in parts of a sheet of paper to keep track of how much they'd mastered. Now one of them is going to a swim party for accomplishments in reading. At least one of us is confused.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:05pm
No. Your point was that parents who give a damn don't have sick kids and therefore have perfect attendance. And I was wondering how that possibly worked given that most illness are by chance.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:05pm
Maybe you see harm, but not every parent does. Or every educator. Or every administrator. That is why they are implemented. I see harm in involving my child in too many extra-curricular activities so I don't participate in them. You see value in multiple extra-curricular activities, so you do use them. Different strokes for different folks.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:07pm
Would you have to explain why they weren't getting a cake? Or would they just not notice that there was no cake? Associating a food with a holiday also doesn't mean that they fall to pieces if the association is broken. I am sure that my kids wouldn't fall to pieces if some Thursday they didn't have to take the trash to the curb. Nevertheless, they would still associate Thursday with trash....
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:09pm
Well then, why the boredom and dislike of school you mentioned earlier?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:11pm

"Would you have to explain why they weren't getting a cake? Or would they just not notice that there was no cake?"

None of us would probably notice because we'd most likely be having too much fun.

"I am sure that my kids wouldn't fall to pieces if some Thursday they didn't have to take the trash to the curb."

Sure, not about trash. But, you said you would never break tradition and not bake cookies for those special holidays. What reaction are you fearing?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:16pm
Except that isn't my child's personality. I am not going to change the competitive side of my child's personality just to make you happy. They know that "much is expected of them" and that they are to freely give. (Let's not throw Bible verses into this, you won't outdo me there). And they do that. In one small aspect of their life, I am not going to take away the pride they have when they bring home their certificate of accomplishment and say, "Mom, look what I EARNED". So what if he likes to be acknowledged. It does not make him a bad child, an immature child, a child who is going to grow up to be buried in credit card debt. It makes him a happy child and that is all that matters to me. Just because some statistic established by some scientist somewhere determined that if adversely affects some children, I am not going to tell him he can't have his wall of awards, or his shelf of medals and trophies, or his pictures from his award parties. It does not adversely affect him in the least bit. I don't live my life and raise my children guided by some vague statistics, I live my life and raise my children by what works for me and for them. If a scientist wants to come and study my children and then write a book or report or whatever ON THEM ONLY, then I would listen. I know what works for my kids way more than any stranger does.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:18pm
I enjoy makng the dishes and treats that my great-grandmother made for my grandmother, my grandmother made for my mother and my mother made for me. I like the feeling of knowing that each of my five sisters is probably making the same recipes and serving them to their kids and grandkids on the holiday in question. It's special to me, a tradition that links the female members of my family across time and space. It's a tradition that makes me feel good, helps me feel grounded, and reminds me of my childhood. I see no reason to stop doing those things, to stop making those dishes. On the other hand, if my family members didn't notice or care whether I made their special cakes or not, I probably wouldn't do it. Part of why I continue to do it is because we all do enjoy our traditions.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2004
Sat, 09-23-2006 - 4:20pm

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I said they mastered the concepts quicker than most of the other kids. Your kids never master a concept?

I also thought you sad that the "rewards" at your kids' schools were things like getting to color in parts of a sheet of paper to keep track of how much they'd mastered. Now one of them is going to a swim party for accomplishments in reading.

I said the awards they get grow as the work they have to accomplish grows. In kindergarten, they get the certificate that they make on their own (that would be DD), in first grade, they get to bring home a book (that is DS) in third grade they get to go to a swimming party if the achieve a level in reading before the deadline (that is DS#2). I highly doubt my oldest kids would work hard for a colored piece of paper.

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