SAH doesn't support change,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
SAH doesn't support change,
3723
Sat, 08-26-2006 - 4:58pm

"SAH doesn't support change, it supports going backwards to the 1950's,"

Statement in a post below.

I wholeheartedly disagree. To me, SAH is a choice. How is that going back to the 1950s, when a lot of women didn't have much of a choice.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:22pm
Well, I am an ACTUAL adult, and I disagree. I don't care if you give me credit for being an actual adult, and I don't care if you agree with me. I also don't care what you consider a "worthy" alternative. I have my own definition of what is worthy, and being that it's my life, my definition is a bit more important to me than yours. My grandfather is quite ill and will probably have to shut that restaurant down. He needs help right now, and we're even considering moving there when we get out in order to help him so his life's legacy won't go to crap when he dies. I think helping my grandfather run a family business that he's operated for 60 years and serving the patrons who have watched me grow since I was a child and who are like extended family is a fine and perfectly 'worthy' alternative to nursing school. You can disagree all you want, but once again, you don't know me, what I treasure, or the circumstances of my life. You're judging me false because you do NOT know me. I mean, God forbid I help operate a family business that is like an heirloom, something that actually maens something to me, rather than take people's blood pressure because some person on the internet thought that was the only worthy thing to do. I mean, LOL. What shall I do...help my father with his restaurant and inherit it when he passes, keep the legacy alive...or cut people's hair? HMMM. Haha.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:26pm
I know plenty of people for whom they do generate a living wage. Those wouldn't be things that I would have to do very long, only until I've got a career going. These days it doesn't take long to earn a degree, and there is LOTS of money available to those who seek it. You can keep going on and on about how working as a waitress my whole life would be soo terrible, but you know what? I know plenty of people--even family members--that do just fine working as waitresses and who love it. Having a grandfather who owns a restaurant and has run it for many years, waitressing isn't a profession I see as unworthy. And you know what else? I've already said I wouldn't be waitressing MY WHOLE LIFE if that situation did come up. In the UNLIKELY situation that my husband ran off, I'd have to do something like that for say, two years (which is how long it takes to get a nursing degree, should I pursue that path), maybe a few months thereafter, and then I'd have one of the careers you think are oh-so-worthy. You don't have the same history as me, and you do NOT know what cost of living is where I'm from nor do you have any clue as to how far I can make a small amout of money last. You don't know me, so stop judging me. I don't care what you think because I KNOW otherwise. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:29pm
No, I don't think I need to read that. I'm not her, and she's not from the same place as me. What a person can earn depends not only on their career but on location. What a person needs to survive depends on various factors. And whether a person can live off a certain amount of money depends on many things, including the person. Keep preaching. I'm just going to turn a deaf ear. I'm not a lost soul that's looking to be saved.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:33pm
I feel I can guide my children towards their potential without raving like a lunatic if they announce they want to get married at age 18 or become a mother at 19 and without having a college degree, at least right now. I can wait until my children are in elementary, middle, high school or even college to go get one if I chose. It doesn't make me any less intelligent, any less of a role model, or any less capable of guiding my children. I'd go back to work if I had to as well, and regardless of what these people think, you can earn enough money to significantly help out--or even survive on your own, if you lower your expenses--without having a 'career.'
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:35pm
I know plenty of women with more than one kids older than mine who survive very well as SAHMs. Maybe the answer for me will be putting my children in low-cost activities, rather than high-cost ones. And of course, there's also the fact that I don't have to pay a dime for health care. That is lovely.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:38pm
I don't see how believing that a college degree isn't absolutely necessary or that going to college immediately after high school isn't the only time you can go is a "limited perspective" on the purpose, only of the necessity and the 'required' timing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:39pm
Yes, I'm sure that because YOU felt a certain way, that's the way ALL parents are going to feel--even if their personalities, ideals, parenting style, hopes & dreams are different.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2005
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:47pm

Where, and what kind of degrees, are you talking about? Even though many of my former students had almost a year's worth of college credit before entering college, they still take four years to graduate.

If anything, statistics show that students are taking longer to graduate.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:49pm

If the baby is sated before the last breast is emptied, and you're needing to build a stock pile or increase your supply to offset a possible decrease due to pumping insteading of nursing, then you would want to increase supply. A baby that falls asleep before the breast is emptied isn't necessarily sated, just lulled to sleep, and could wake up at any moment to feed again especially if clusterfeeding during a growth spurt. The point of increasing your supply isn't always because it's low. It can be to prepare for a seperation, for pumping instead of nursing, or to create a stockpile. If you knew as much about breastfeeding as you claim, you'd know that there are reasons for increasing supply besides just having a low supply already.

The nutritional content/inensity of breastmilk does not change with the volume. It changes with how long at a feeding the child is nursing. First comes the colustrum, where most of the antibodies are, then the hind milk, where most of the nutrients are. The baby needs both. The amount of nutrients and antibodes don't decrease with the amount of milk you have. They're always there. Whether or not the baby gets them depends on whether or not he nurses long enough, not how much milk you have. If you knew anything about breastmilk, as you claim, you'd know that having more milk doesn't mean you have less nutrients. THAT is an illogical, fancy rationalization. I'm almost giggling thinking about it. I'll have to tell all of my friends with such great supplies how inferior theri breastmilk is to that of people with lower supplies.

It's not a fancy rationalization just because you don't find it logical. I've got this information from many nurses, LCs, and doctors. It isn't something I pulled out of my ass. Pumping to increase your supply should be done while nursing, so you get colustrum and hind milk. Pumping after nursing is okay if you're needing to empty the breast the rest of the way, but it's not the recommended way. And pumping instead of nursing isn't quite as efficient. Usually, you'd have to pump a lot longer than you'd have to nurse to get the same amount of milk. The strength of the suckling and the motion of the tongue have as much to do with how much milk comes out and whether or not the body sees the demand for more as how long you feed.

Once again... I'm still waiting for you to post some proof otherwise, rather than your disagreeing because it simply doesn't make sense to you. I've been nursing for 14 months now, have been researching it even longer, have spoken to many nurses, LCs, doctors, & other breastfeeding women about it. What are your credentials? And what are your sources, so that I might see which professionals back up your claims that having lots of milk means that milk isn't as nutritious! Haha.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Sun, 09-03-2006 - 2:50pm
Sure, I agree that's true for most 18 year-olds, but not all. Rather than quote statistics I'll evaluate my child as an individual.

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