SAH IS HARMFUL!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
SAH IS HARMFUL!!!
2888
Thu, 07-08-2004 - 11:32am

Or at least this woman thinks so.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 2:27pm

In early childhood settings where more than one caregiver works with children in a group, the term "primary caregiver" is used to describe a consistent caregiver whose responsibility it is to develop a relationship between him/herself, the child, and the family. . .emphasis is placed on consistency, stability, and familiarity.


There's nothing about a set number of hours or waking hours in the definition.

Virgo

Virgo
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 2:29pm
Wow, this confirms I coddle my children.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2004
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 2:29pm

That's so true! My SAHM friends have their kids in bed much earlier, and absolutely LIVE for that evening alone time! And I can't blame them.

Mondo

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 2:35pm
No, not quite. My SIL left this morning. Whew. At the last minute, she invited herself and her family to my house for the weekend because our husbands were going to a Metallica concert Monday night. Which was fine but when she walked in the door with FIVE suitcases (she has only one child) I should have known... She ended up staying an extra three days and would have stayed here indefinitely if I hadn't started to send out some signals of bitchiness. This week was day camp for the big kids and I had Projects lined up which of course had to be thrown out the window since I was entertaining her. So I am trying to get back in my groove here at home and I have stuff to do but don't really want to do it (I'm in HouseGuest Recovery Mode) and I'm not really engaged in the debate today. My three year old is outside riding his tricycle and my four year old is working on an art project and I am running from here to there to supervise and I'm sure that means all my posts are pretty haywire...

But the party is tonight. My dh and I, a cooler of beer, some Italian deli food, a boat, and no children. So watch for some seriously incoherent posts at about 2 am!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2004
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 2:35pm

I question if I could WOH and still be a good

Mondo

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 2:36pm

Well you do whats best for your kids.

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Avatar for outside_the_box_mom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 2:44pm
Last time I checked, my child was a boy, not a machine. As such, when he was six weeks old, his needs required more than simple oversight by a highly paid "senior IT specialist." I can take care of machines, too. The vacuum cleaner, for example. It sits in the garage. I'm its primary caregiver -- I empty out its bag every three months.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 3:15pm
Well, maybe they aren't the kind of sleepovers you are thinking of. They are the kind we have at Grandma's (where she has always had a crib for us) about once a month and the kind we have at my sisters' (where the kids all just sleep on the floor of their cousins' bedrooms) about once every three months. My mom and sister live a little over an hour away. My two youngest are actually spending the night at Grandma's tonight because I couldn't find a babysitter and wanted to go out with dh. We also stay at the homes of relatives when we visit out of state but my dh and I are usually present for those (or we stumble in the door at 1 am...) The family friend kind of sleepovers are less frequent. I have two friends who are brave enough to take my children for the night. The three year old has only been on one of these kinds of sleepovers. You have to be pretty good friends to volunteer to have four children over to spend the night!

The crib had to be taken down when the littlest was under two, if I can remember correctly. He was flinging himself over the edge and wandering the house at night. He sleeps in a trundle bed. But we used to have a port-a-crib that he would sleep in readily at other people's houses. When he was nine months old he slept on the floor of a closet for a week in Mexico. So the crib thing was not a big deal here.

I think when you spend time visiting relatives and sleeping on the floor whenever and wherever, the kids don't get too worked up to be without parents for the night or sleeping somewhere besides their own crib. You have to realize that my three year old has just been along for the ride since the day he was born--he really knows no other life. My kids actually really look forward to anything labeled a sleepover, even the boring ones at Grandma's (where we've been known to stay for two or three nights in a row when my dh is traveling.) They relish a chance to do something different than sleep in their own bed in their own (boring) house. It can be embarrassing to be at our friends' homes for dinner and have out kids ask flat out if they can stay the night.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 3:23pm

My oldest slept over at his grandparents at about 18 months in a portable crib she purchased, same place where he had taken naps during the day or fallen asleep in the evenings when they watched him.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 3:40pm
We rented a crib for Joey - they delivered it to the rental house and set it up for us.

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