Is SAH really because the children what

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2003
Is SAH really because the children what
1206
Fri, 10-06-2006 - 3:33pm

it....


Okay first I want to say hello everyone I haven't had the time to keep up with this very fast moving board :)


Now

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:32am

Yes, there is and those other things didn't change with my (or dh's) work status. Things like being able to argue (politely, with logic and reason not emotion) with us and having us listen respectfully to their arguements and judge them (the arguements) on their merits before using parental power, having us say "you're right" when they are, having us say "I'm sorry" when we are wrong and the child is right, having full rein (within the constrains of age and safety) for their creativity and imagination, having us say "I don't know. Let's find out". Things like having family dinner (which is easier when the children are young than when they get to be teens and college age), reading, chores, taking responsibility for one's own actions (and suffering the consequences of them), working for what they want, etc. Letting them try and fail and applauding when they get it right.

All of which my parents taught my siblings and I. Our mom was a sahm until my brother was in high school (I'm 8 years older than my brother). Another thing that was handed down to us was the idea that you don't buy what you can make/create yourself. That includes recovering furniture, doing handiman mantainence, making drapes, doing redecorating, making a loft bed, etc. Our first thought when faced with any job, is doing it ourselves before hiring it done.

On a side note: if all of your children as adults decide that they "hate" ranching and don't want the family ranch, will you decide that they have gone against your family/core values, against everything that you worked for?

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:34am
LOL... Nope! Thanks for the compliment though!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:37am

Usually when a person uses a term of endearment on a message board with people he/she doesn't know it comes across as condescending.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2000
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:42am

IMO, that applies in real life, too...not just on message boards.

It's different once people are familiar with each other, but otherwise, even if meant well, the person may not know the speaker well enough to know that.

Sorry for jumping in. I have loads of IRL stories about this...it's kind of a pet issue for me.LOL


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2006
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:43am

Sorry im not wrong and no iam not back tracking I have said time and time agian that it takes a village to raise a family pastors teachers principles dcp nannies coaches police men grandparents housekeepers ect ect ect.

I never once have said teachers are not caring for children it should be common sense teachers care for children or they would not be teachers.

sheesh...quiteaccussing me of things iam not doing i have nothing to hide or be ashamed i know what i said and i stand by it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:43am
I can see in the case of a family business that your work is more than just work to you.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:46am

My profession is part of my identity, just as being a wife, mother and Presbyterian elder are all parts of my identity.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2006
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:49am

OHHHHHH clunk me on the head...OF COURSE i see the diff...shame on me..how can ppl be so cruel blows my mind.

Forgive me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:52am
i agree with you that the type of care a child needs by school age is different than nose and bum wiping. but those rules of behavior, and realistically at least a few individual pointers on hygiene and other matters, are essential to running a classroom of 20-30 elementary school-aged children. saying that school is different than dc because teachers don't change diapers isn't really a compelling argument for anything--except perhaps for the fact that there isn't a compelling argument to be made.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2006
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 11:54am
I get it, so it took me awhile so now we all know iam a true blonde lol . great post!


Edited 10/13/2006 12:01 pm ET by yesmomma

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