Is the SAHM the new status symbol?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Is the SAHM the new status symbol?
1697
Tue, 09-23-2003 - 10:36pm
In the 70's and 80's women fought to get into the workforce (the whole Ms. magazine generation)...and then the tide turned in the late 1990's when more women started to stay home by choice. Now, it seems like being a SAHM is a status symbol....and superior to being a working mom.

Kat

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Sat, 10-04-2003 - 6:00pm
Okay, sure whatever you say....
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Sat, 10-04-2003 - 6:07pm
Yeah it was nice...he was a evil rotten human being who abuses women in every way cheats on women treats women as objects and makes them live as prisoners in their own home he was a closet drug addict, (steroids) patholigical liar (if there is nothing i detest more it is the stench of lies) and a sex addict. He deserved worse but i gave him a break b/c I felt nothing but pity for him. He finally got caught at his crimes and did time for them. He has rehabilitated and i have forgiven him.

When i think back on those times...I feel very fortuante to still be alive.








Edited 10/4/2003 6:50:34 PM ET by silverunity

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2003
Sat, 10-04-2003 - 6:27pm
Here is where we differ... I would recommend it as a long term career and know quite a few people who are professional servers and are making a comfortable stable living doing it. Many of them go one to either open their own place or retire early and travel. No, they are not wealthy but many do have their finances in order and lead a very productive well established lifestyle. It is a lucrative job!...your experience to me sounds like you were in the wrong place at the worng time or your resturaunt's food and concept was not a hit...Look around you 1ss food, drinks and resturaunts is the trend. The food channel should prove that to you.







Edited 10/4/2003 7:21:02 PM ET by silverunity

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2003
Sun, 10-05-2003 - 12:52am
I met Maxchandler on the other message board when her little boy was a year old. Her sister had started posting there before she. I had known her like 6 years by the time we met up this summer. I've also met her sister at the same time. There have been many ladies who have met and even now have a yearly reuinion from the board where we all participate. A nice little club of friends. We've all been posting there for years & never dull of it. It isn't a debate board, just a chat board. We all feel comfortable enough to exchange emails, send personal pix, do gift exchanges at holiday and secret pals and yes, to meet up.

I know Maxchandler & her sister went to a meet & greet of some of the ladies from the board & I know one girl Maxchandler invited over from here at ivillage that had just moved to Nashville & they have gotten together. That girl has been posting a long time over at the board. Claire is a regular. I've not met her but we have exchanged gifts & pix.

When you post daily (or about that) on a board for as long as we all have over there you become friends & do decide to meet IRL. After all these years we feel like one big happy family.

I prefer to just lurk here. I'm not into debating. Every now & then I'll put in my nickle's worth but usually don't even offer a penny.

Maxchandler does participate at some of the ivillage boards like the general chat or sah support ones & I know I've seen her at like a specific topic board (cosmetics, disney, religious support boards) I've seen her postings. They are under her new name but her profile even says she use to post as Maxchandler.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2003
Sun, 10-05-2003 - 1:01am
She still doesn't have a web site. Few of us call each other by our real names, we know each other by our online names. Even when we've met up, or email each other. Whether we've exchanged gifts, pix and know the personal details we still refer to one another as the name we have always known one another as from the chatting board. Somehow that name just fits after you've used it to chat daily.

What is wrong with giving your user name (if you don't mind) from one web site to another? I don't find that odd. Then again I don't mind saying where I post. If people from one site want to go over to another to see what is going on I'll be glad to say I've posted there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2003
Sun, 10-05-2003 - 1:18am
I'm not a newcomer. I don't participate as I really see debating a waste of time when I'm going to do what I please without others input in my life. I know how WOH can be unfavorable when one doesn't need it financially. I'm not going to defend myself for doing it. But I've lurked here to listen in to the debate for a few years now. I just can't believe people actually debate their lives and choices. But the fact they do is interesting.

It doesn't matter how long the posters have been posting. The mere fact that you can take a group of posters who agree with one another & accuse them of all being one person yet take another group of posters doing the same thing and demand respect for them since they have board status is wrong (feel free to disagree but I won't change my mind). Being a public debate board you are bound to get new people all of the time. This board has a bad reputation (which I'm sure you could care less about) for being snobbish. I've heard that lurking around ivillage & places outside of this community.

Don't bother replying. Your on my "ignore" feature along with a few others from this board that I totally disagree with about, well, everything. This is really a waste of my time, but I was bored & checked the "ignore" list tonight. Turning that feature back on since I think it is the greatest thing ivillage came up with on this new format.

Avatar for kazoomom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 10-05-2003 - 7:44am
Are you all WOH'S? What you write is very interesting because Max always said she didn't have any SAH friends. She didn't know any SAHs in her neighborhood. She never had any friends who could help her out if needed, like during jury duty or if she were ill. And she never went out to meet friends at night when she was home with her TV and her pie. She always told us she was very careful about giving out her information. In fact, she said she didn't do this (exchange pictures, etc.) And now we find out from you that she did this all the time with a group of online personalities? I guess you are speaking of claireandmybaby as well. I don't remember her whole story but I do remember that she was friends with Max online.

I'm curious as to what her online friends thought of all her lies.

Avatar for kazoomom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 10-05-2003 - 7:57am
But your friend MAX was never snobbish?!!! That's a hoot!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2003
Sun, 10-05-2003 - 8:26am
Come on. I've read this board for a long time. I've known Maxchandler for a long time. She is always talking about meeting up with friends for lunch or her late night desserts. Shopping with friends is a favorite past time for her. She has mentioned it right here at ivillage, probably right here on this board. And you say she says she never went out to meet friends? She even travels with friends!

Her sister is a Sahm and has been for about as long as Maxchandler. As for other friends, there in her hometown, she has met and became friends with several Sahms, more so since her oldest started school 3 years ago. So she does now. Our board is made up of sah/woh/wah and pt variations of them all. We have ladies who have grown kids, those with small ones, and up until very recently ladies like myself that are not mothers. It isn't a parenting board so not for mothers or sah or woh only. We have some single ladies who chat with us from their work. There are women who sah and women who woh that are very into their careers.

Like I said. I've known her for over 6 years. Many of us women do feel comfortable enough to give out personal information, participate in secret pal & secret Santa gift exchanges, and even give out pix. We trade coupons, etc. We don't openly give out the information right on the web site for anyone and everyone to read. I think you misunderstood.

Lies? I've never once caught Max in a lie. The others have not either. There has never been any questioning of her or her character on that board in all the years. Like I said, we are all friends who chat off/on every day, let the others know when we will be away and not posting. It is a nice board with a lot of really nice ladies to chat with.

Avatar for kazoomom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 10-05-2003 - 8:39am
So would you keep her kids if she were on jury duty? Would you have kept her only son if she were on jury duty?

She never mentioned you.

If you've read this board for such a long time, you will surely remember that she claimed she graduated from college and then she claimed she never set foot on a college campus. She claimed she was tall and thin and then she claimed she was short.

Could you describe her physical appearance in generic terms? I mean, if you've met her you could tell us a little bit about her appearance without revealing her identity. Can you do that?

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