SAHM's and Money

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
SAHM's and Money
1310
Fri, 06-23-2006 - 1:57pm
I am a WOHM but have always felt like this, even as a kid. I know it is probably wrong, but it is a strong feeling I have had.
When SAHM's say "I bought this or "I saved MY money for this", I always want to say "YOUR" money? Now, don't get me wrong, my mom was a SAHM and a great one at that but she would get spending money every week, just like I do, while working, but I can't feel technically that it was "HER" money.
Staying home is a hard job, being home today I can say that it is much harder to have a stressful out of the house job AND have kids but it is more physically demanding then my job.
I just feel that any money in the household has been made by the dh and is really "HIS" all the time. He just gives it to his wife to spend. I know this is horrible but I was wondering if anyone else felt this way?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:08pm
Because just as if I stayed home I would do everything (NO, I do not do everything now as everyone assumes-I broke it all down before), he would be expected to do everthing inside of the home if he stayed home.
Avatar for mom2danjam
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:08pm
Hey if you are not bothered by a man who doesn't care enough to clean his own house, then I am not either. I am mainly bothered "for" those who DO NOT like it when their husband doesn't help.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:10pm
The ONLY day I would say I might have was on the 23rd. The 24th and 25th were the weekend and I was not on the internet at work on Monday and Tuesday. I only go on it when I need to research something.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:12pm
There seems to be no problem with you if a man slacks off, there are a million and one excuses(he is a slob, he doesn't see it...etc), if a woman does it though, she is lazy. Nice double standard.If my dh was like yours, I'd want to know why he couldn't pitch in around the house more since I'd be working too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:14pm
No, I said a woman who was a SAHM who did nothing was lazy. I did not say a man who works a physically hard fulltime job was lazy if he was tired at the end of the day. There is a big difference.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:16pm
Once again what makes you think he'd automatically do everything the way you expected if he stayed at home? I didn't say you do everything but you admit you do more than him, why is that okay? Is it because he is a man? You seem to have higher expectations of women than you do of men.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:19pm
I thought you weren't allowed on the net at work? I am getting the feeling you aren't being very straightforward here.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:20pm
No, because I am just more neurotic with having the house cleaned up then him, that is why I do more.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
Thu, 06-29-2006 - 7:22pm
Where did I say that you said the man was lazy? Once again there is always an excuse for a man. Sahms can't very well do nothing all day unless the kid is taking care of him/herself.

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