SAHM/WOHD Issue

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
SAHM/WOHD Issue
1289
Thu, 07-13-2006 - 4:35pm

My husband came home the other day with this story:

His coworker, J and J's wife, K just had a set of twins born via in-vitro after 17 years of marriage and infertility. Anyway, the end of the pregnancy was difficult and K was on bedrest and the babies were born (I think) 6 weeks early - one of them had to stay in the hospital for 2 weeks after birth. OK - that's the background.

K got a lot of attention during pregnancy - not being able to move around on her own. Now the babies are 4 months old, but although she is a SAHM, she expects (yes, expects) J to leave work every day at 4. That's the normal time, but at times they are required to work overtime if something has broken and needs to be fixed before the next shift comes in. According to my husband, J comes home every night and fixes dinner, washes bottles, takes care of the babies, and then gets up with them in the middle of the night. The only time K is bothered with them is during the day when she's home alone. (I know, this account is how J related it to my husband, so the story is probably more one-sided than the situation really is.) And K may have post-partum depression and that can explain needing J so much....

K's mom and sister both lives within a halfmile of her and can come to help with the babies, but she expects J to leave work everyday at 4 to do it. She also calls a lot during the day. Anyway, the other day something had broken and J needed to stay past 4, but he tried to leave - my husband's and J's boss told J that he needed to decide what is more important - him taking care of those babies or him working to provide for those babies? Sounds to me like J's job is starting to be in jeopardy and he makes pretty good money for the area of the country we live in. Replacing that income would be very hard.

Just wanted to see what y'all thought about this.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:00pm

um,since when is a news release translation for what she says on her show? while she may interchange both depending on who her audience is (many speakers do that),she has indeed said sah is the toughest job in the world...sorry i can't copy a link of her episodes in which she says that to her audience on this board. she's better on tv than what news reports say anyway. i stand behind my remark.

p.s. try *watching* her some morning or afternoon,depending on when she's on in your area..you may be pleasantly or not so pleasantly surprised by what she has to say. :)




Edited 7/19/2006 3:03 pm ET by egd3blessed

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:01pm
Don't you expect your DS teachers to handle certain situations with your kids? Like I said, because I was nursing I got up with the kids. My DH was more than happy to handle other things because I was tired.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2004
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:01pm

If I was at work posting on a message board that, IMO, would be an example of a less than stellar work ethic. You do realize that not everyone works 9-5 Monday thru Friday, right, lol. Nice try though.

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:03pm

Where did the five minutes every hour come from?


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:03pm
I would be mad too. If I were exhausted and needed my DH to help me at night with the baby I would be furious if he laughed at me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:04pm
I said that in one of my posts. I was asking her her definition of "calling all day". Is it talking non-stop the whole 8 or so hours or is it calling every hour and talking for 5 minutes? I was trying to get a definition from her.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:06pm
Really she wasn't? Go reread her post. She clearly insinuated that my DH was lying to me so that I wouldn't call him at work.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:07pm
Like I said...Ever hear of school? Her DS just turned one. I would never offer to watch someone's children when I had my hands that busy. Two of my children were at school when her DS was born and the times I offered for her girls to come play with my DD.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:09pm
Well, stop making him sound like some delicate Swarovski crystal figurine! He's a cop for crying out loud.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2006
In reply to: jen1098
Wed, 07-19-2006 - 3:10pm

Every hour for 5 minutes. ;O)

Actually I would think calling your spouse unless absolutely necessary is too much. One personal call a day when it isn't necessary is enough.

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