SAH/WOH--extramarital affairs

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2004
SAH/WOH--extramarital affairs
1037
Tue, 02-15-2005 - 12:54pm

I was just at the gym this morning and overheard a conversation between two women on treadmills who were discussing/debating as to whether married sahms were any more or less likely to have affairs than married wohms.

I thought it would be interesting to hear your thoughts on this.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 10:43am
Is it really your father, or is it her sence of insult and injustice, that she still isn't over? Very, very different things. If its the insult and the injustice, its herself - her ego - that she isn't getting over. Sometimes people do get dumped by those they really love. But more often than not, its not like that. The love is long gone, and the one who gets dumped hasn't unexpectedly lost a love they cherished, they've just lost a power struggle they fully expected to win.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 10:49am
Quite frankly, the negative attention pms receives, as the mother of all mood detractors, has long ammused me. Its got nothing on the sexually frustrated male. Women don't seem to react nearly the way men do, to lack of sex. I can tell perfectly well who is, and who isn't getting any, on any kind of regular basis, if I have to spend any time around a man at all. And when its routinely not enough, its not a "just fine" scene. Its a difficult to work with and be around scene. Glad that boyfriend of yours wasn't one of my co-workers. Would not have wanted to deal with it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 11:01am
Oh heck. I don't even think preferring monogamy is normal. Not in terms of sex, anyway. As a means to creating a stable relationship that stands a chance of surviving a lifetime, and will which permit some sort of organized and predicatble management of resources in a particular society, expecially as they pertain to the support of offspring - yes. But that is a preference for various kinds of lifestyle stability, not a preference for monogamy. Give something up, to get something else. But its definitley giving something up, for most people, I think.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 11:03am
So you're saying you have pretty much, no sex drive, then? Because if you have any at all, I suspect most people who have to be around you, would rather you just went ahead and lost that contest.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 11:11am

I back this all the way.

Especially with the older generations, who came of age sexually when sex was still very very taboo. Lets face it...women back then were expected to do alot of "putting up with" the sexual needs of men. They used to teach the young girls to "think of it like the dusting" and also, that they just might have to turn a blind eye to a cheating husband. A woman's ability to provide well for children was so often influenced by her ability to turn that blind eye. I don't know how old these parents are. But I would never presume to know about all the skeletons of any kind in anyones closet. Least of all the ones related to their sex lives. Especially when I am part of the family - as thats where these skeletons can actually do soem damage, no matter how long they've been hidden. Even less so for anyone over 60.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 11:13am
No, it's most definitely my father.

Virgo

Virgo
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 11:16am

I have a sex drive. . .I feel confident in saying my sex drive is smaller than a number of those on this board.


My sex drive, however, doesn't have to compete with others on this board.

Virgo
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 11:19am
The affair posses the lions share of the emmotional entaglement risk. For the most part, bilateral emmotional entaglement leads to sex which gets carried out as an affair. Not as a one night stand. One night stands don't lead to emmotional entanglement nearly as often. Thats why they are one night stands.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 11:39am
Amazingly enough, I agree with you on this one. Just because breastfeeding affects my hormones in a way the seriously decreases my sex drive doesn't mean my husband should go without for 14 months and counting.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Tue, 02-22-2005 - 12:22pm
I'm glad you weren't one of his coworkers either. What a hideous thought.

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

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