SAH/WOH: It's always a choice

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2004
SAH/WOH: It's always a choice
329
Tue, 07-14-2009 - 3:11pm

Hi All,


I'm new to this board and totally fascinated by the WOH/SAH debate.

Penn Girl

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-04-2009 - 2:09pm

Exactly, that's why we post here....to debate everything from the big (sah/woh# to the small (size of wine glasses) and everything in between.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2009
Tue, 08-04-2009 - 2:12pm
Yes arguing and debating are 2 different things, I've got thick skin, just don't like it when people try to make me feel like I'm less than them. As I said before I've said what I wanted on this debate board. I have nothing further.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-04-2009 - 2:13pm

Disagreement and questioning of opinions on a debate board, done respectively, which I have done so, is not bashing, it's debating.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-04-2009 - 2:17pm

Nothing in my post were trying to do anything other than debate the comments that were posted.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2009
Tue, 08-04-2009 - 2:23pm

no on can make you feel 'less than'

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2009
Tue, 08-04-2009 - 4:13pm

If you thought that was my point you compeltely misunderstood my post.

You stated your opinion.

She stated her opinion (which happened to not agree with yours)

If you have a right to state your opinion than she has an equal right to state her opinion.

You cannot have it both ways. You cannot say that you have a right to state your opinion but someone else cannot state theirs if they do not agree with yours.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2009
Tue, 08-04-2009 - 6:06pm
So what would you have done for childcare if your dh hadn't been laid off?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Tue, 08-04-2009 - 9:49pm
That's my view of parenting, but unfortunately I have a teen and preteens who disagree rather vocally.
Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Wed, 08-05-2009 - 4:08am
Bwa! Ditto.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Wed, 08-05-2009 - 8:01am

You ARE allowed to say what you want (within TOS) and so is anyone else. Just as you can respond to a poster with whom you disagree, other posters can respond to *your* posts if they disagree. The is the essence of debate. The best debates, however, go beyond mere "opinion" and have facts to back up those opinions.

I have no doubt, no doubt, that you feel that your son's situation is the best possible situation you can provide for him at this moment. That is great. However, from your posts, it sounds like his care situation just happened, you and your DH made the best of it and found out it is pretty great for your family at this time.

Having a sahp *can* be the best thing for a child or a family. However, it doesn't mean that it is the best thing for *every* child or every family- even if a parent can "afford" to sah. Each child is different and has different needs. As a result, different care situations work best for different children. Each parent is different and has different situations that work best for his or her needs.

There is no "One True Way" regarding child care or raising children. There is no *one* ideal. It depends on the availability of quality affordable childcare that meets a child's personality. It depends on the flexibility of both parent's jobs. It depends on the family's support network. It depends on the personal experiences of both parents. It depends on the careers of both parents and if those careers can be easily downsized and/or can be re-entered after a period of time. It depends on the personalities of the children. It depends on the personalities of each parent. It depends on the family's world view and faith. It depends on the health/disabilities of family members. The "best" can change as the children age.

IMO, the best option for a family is to have options from which to choose.

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