SAH/WOH - Why?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
SAH/WOH - Why?
3166
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 7:41am

I am sure this has been done before but I was wondering this in light of recent posts lately.

Why did you decide to sah/woh?

Was it a choice or something expected of you?

Was your plan to sah/woh though out or impulsive? Long-term or short-term?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2005
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 6:47am

<< But, after having my second child, I'm convinced that I'm really just along for the ride.>>

That's certainly an extreme position as there are many dual wohps who feel that during the day, with phone contact and taking off a few hours of work, they still have some say in their babies/children's eventual outcome.

<>

That may be true. But what about you? As a parent, aren't you allowed to get anything out of the parenting experience? Is a sahp selfish if she says, I too enjoyed my years at-home and I am a different ~ even better ~ parent than I would have been if I had worked?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2005
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 7:10am

Why did you decide to sah/woh?

Our finances allowed me to sah and I thought it would be easier than woh. Then, there were other considerations too, such as during the pregnancy, I really got nervous about daycare and thought I would like sah better than working.

Was it a choice or something expected of you?

Apparently both. My boss knew and chuckled at seeing my nervousness in telling him. He had met my DH and just assumed I'd quit.

But the decision was mine to make. DH hoped I'd sah because he thinks it's best, but understood I'd worked very hard on my education and career to that point.

Was your plan to sah/woh though out or impulsive? Long-term or short-term?

I just assumed I'd continue working after children. My education and career were not easy achievements for me. Yet, the decision to sah was made with the long-term in mind, in that I knew I couldn't return to the same job I had.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 7:15am
There are "experts" that are pro-spanking but they usually base it in Christianity. They use religion as the reason why spanking is okay.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 8:02am

In my state it does. Corporal punishment is not illegal in my state. That doesn't mean I wouold allow anyone from the school to lay a hand on my child.

Susan

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 8:09am
Good Luck with that.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 8:15am

***If the only way to get their attention was to hit them, then I am doing something wrong in my other avenues of discipline.***

I guess if I felt like a failure like you do I wouldn't spank either. However I don't feel like a failure at all when it comes to parenting. My children are great kids that are very happy and healthy. So I have no feelings of failure.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 8:17am
Umm hello? Do you honestly think I would spank my child over a coat? What makes you think that we don't use these types of methods? It is almost hysterical that you automatically assume that if my child doesn't do what she or he is asked she or he gets a beating. LOL!! Thanks for giving me a better insight to your thoughts. You couldn't be further off.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 8:21am

****Spanking--even non-absusive spanking--can cause irrepairable emotional damage. and the worst thing is, you'll never know until it's too late. For other kids, spanking is such a non-threat to them, you can spank and spank and spank, and it will afford you nothing, other than a kid who laughs at you and goes and does it anyway. Again, you don't know what the result will be until it's too late to take it back.***

There are lots of things that can cause this. Right off the top of my head is divorce. So I am guessing one shouldn't do that either eh?

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 8:22am
Because the majority of the time the methods of discipline that we use are effective. Like I have posted before the last time our son got a spanking was over 2 years ago.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Sun, 02-26-2006 - 8:29am
My children as soon as they could walk hated the grocery cart and the stroller. They have never hated their car seats. Now that they are both in booster seats the love they can seatbelts themselves in.

 

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