SAH/WOH - Why?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
SAH/WOH - Why?
3166
Mon, 02-20-2006 - 7:41am

I am sure this has been done before but I was wondering this in light of recent posts lately.

Why did you decide to sah/woh?

Was it a choice or something expected of you?

Was your plan to sah/woh though out or impulsive? Long-term or short-term?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 3:59pm
I used a harness routinely with my dd2, from the time she got on her feet until she was almost 3yo; she was that wild. It was a lifesaver.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2005
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:01pm

And now I don't understand why my questioning you about your insults yields further insults.

Will you explain your post and explain who these "some people" are? Or are you just doing the whole TOS dance? In that case, I just don't understand why you can't be forthcoming and detail what the heck you're talking about?

<>

This is what is done on a parenting debate board. No one is being obnoxious or holier than thou ~ it's just that discipline will always be a heated subject.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:02pm
IMO opinion that makes it even creepier. If you're rational enough to deliberately spank, seems to me it should be possible to come up with something else.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:04pm
I'm not sure what kind of answer you're looking for here, but if you think something is to be gained in that situation by hitting back, I'm sure you're mistaken.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:06pm
LOL, but you're correct as usual.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:06pm
We have two per row (I'm talking at Wally World here) and a huge parking lot .. but we have the 3rd busiest (persons per sf) WM in the country. They're building a second one, so, hopefully it will alleviate some of the congestion.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:07pm
Yes I am.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:16pm

<>

I don't think so, at least based on your posts. It's not the same consequence, you are deciding for the child, not the child learning the consequence of their decision. I allow them to make quite a few decisions on their own, yes. They decide what they are going to eat, wear and what activities they do. But again, I have been working with my kids a very long time as they are 8 and almost 10 teaching them to know how to make the right decisions.

I do tell them to do something, yes. I have to remind my oldest to practice guitar about 50% of the time, if he decided not to do so after me telling him, his consequence is that he stops guitar lessons, he knows that. I don't expect my children to remember everything that is going, so I do tell them or remind them on occasions to stay on task or to check out their chore list that was mutually agreed upon before they receive their allowances. They are after all only children.
<<<<<

Apparently telling your child to practice or he will lose his lessons is TOTALL different from telling the child to wear a coat or he can't go outside. The above was in response to this.

>>***So perhaps you have no behavioral issues with your children because you are making all of the decisions for them, while many of us are allowing (and have been for awhile) our children to learn to make their own decisions and face the consequences of those decisions?***

That is so far off base that I don't even know where to start. She said if her DD gave her a hard time about wearing a coat she would let her go out anyway and be cold and learn her lesson. I said I would not let me child go somewhere without a coat. I wouldn't make a decision about the coat. Wear the coat or don't go. We have different consequences same discipline style. So are you telling me that you never tell your children what to do? Are you saying that you allow them to make all their decisions?<<<<<<<

Saying that what she is doing is "making all the decisions for them", and then saying what you are doing with the guitar lessons is allowing your childre to learn to make their own decisions is TOTALLy holier than thou, mostly because there is absolutely no difference.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:20pm
I thought I was quite clear. I was also clear that I wasn't talking about you. I'm CLEARLY not the person who needs to try and avoid violating TOS, I've never had a problem with that. I will not engage in anything else with you, since you do enjoy so much to flamebait me. Not happenin, my dear.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Mon, 02-27-2006 - 4:21pm

***Certainly it's a choice, however you said the others were more healthy. I would be interested in seeing some kind of nutrition links that state it is more healthy at that time of day versus you think.***

I thought we went over this? I thought you understood that our son gets his grains everyday by lunchtime. So why would it be healthier to have bread at dinner instead of finishing his peas?

*** The reason behind you not putting it on the table, you don't want the battle.***

No because it is not good for her therapy. Again you have no idea what you are talking about.

***You specifically used the words battle and the reason you didn't have bread at the table was that you didn't want a battle. Interesting in all the many exchanges about this, now you are saying that she doesn't want a child with acid reflux eating bread.***

No she wants the child with acid reflux to eat his vegetables. It is a battle to put bread on the table. He would much rather eat bread than peas. Why would I serve bread knowing he has had enough grain for the day? Why put it on the table and so NO son everyone but you can have bread. That is cruel.

***If he didn't want to practice, I could care less, that would mean he was done with his interest in guitar.***

Again like you said...No practice no guitar lessons. Maybe he isn't in the mood to practice. Funny you will cut off guitar lessons if he doesn't want to practice but he if he wants to stay home from school one day that is A ok! Kind of odd to me.

***So? If my child is willing to except the consequences of his actions than I think it is teaching a lot more than forcing a child or scaring a child with spanking into submission.***

LMAO You keep trying to go back to that. What would make you think my son would get a spanking for not wanting to go to school? If he just didn't want to get up and go to school I would tell him too bad. He has school, and there is no reason to stay home that day. It is silly to even entertain a child that is just being lazy.

*** Although I don't think I am alone in my thinking as many many companies have personal days for their employees...***

Really is school now called a company? Is he employed? Is he an adult?

 

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