SAH/WOH - Why?
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SAH/WOH - Why?
| Mon, 02-20-2006 - 7:41am |
I am sure this has been done before but I was wondering this in light of recent posts lately.
Why did you decide to sah/woh?
Was it a choice or something expected of you?
Was your plan to sah/woh though out or impulsive? Long-term or short-term?

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Why would it be? Think about it. We spank our kids because we have an impulse to do it. We get mad, we tell ourselves the pain or the shock or whatever will impress something important upon them. It's a very primitive, basic reaction because a lot of us have some aggression within us.
Well, kids do too. Lots of aggression, some of them. And they're not better than us at handling it. Worse, in fact. If you demonstrate to your kid that hitting is an acceptable part of a person's behavioral repertoire, even if you like to think he gets it that it's only under very specific circumstances, or within a certain relationship, or whatever, then the kid is likely to figure he can under certain circumstances do it too. And when the impulse comes over him, how likely do you think he is to have the wherewithal to consider carefully if it's the right person, the right time, just cause, etc.? No, he's going to hit, just like we did.
And if he does hit, say at school or at a friend's house, or even at home, who can blame him for being a little confused about whether this is okay? After all, someone he loves very much showed him how.
I am confused. Didn't you say:
If we don't want our kids to drink or smoke, we don't let them see us drink or smoke.
So you DO let them see you drink. So why don't you let her have some wine? Isn't that YOUR natural consequence for letting your DD see you drink wine?
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