Should I stay or should I go?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2009
Should I stay or should I go?
1679
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 2:36pm

Hi ladies! it is so nice to be here and vent vent vent vent!!! I would like to share with you guys what is been BOTHERING me for a while now.

I'm 30 my husband is 50 (doesn't look like 50 AT ALL!) we have a 1 year old boy.

We both have good jobs (diferent cities) we've live in different states since we met. I don't like what I do and I would like to change my career and go back again to Graduate School for another major.

I am an engineer and he is an economist, I want to go back to school for a PhD in Psychology, but first I want to stay at home with my baby until he is ready to go to school and then I could go back to school. This sound like a plan since DH is getting a FANTASTIC job . I mean good benefits, good money, very nice city, etc etc etc.

The problem is:

To do so I have to leave my job and I am scared to death!!! what if we don't work out very well? I will be regreting all my life having left a good job. What I would do if we divorce? Start from zero homeless?

Since he is going to be the one making the money how does that is going to work out? He says he will support me always, and he's been trying to convince me to stay at home with our baby but I've been reluctant (reason why we live in diferent cities) to the idea of not having my own money. He is a very generous man, but with a bit of mood swings. We will be living together for the first time since tomorrow,( since he is in academia he is coming to spend the whole summer here at my city ) I guess I will take it from there and see how we work out as a couple.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2009
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 7:31am
Another way to make the process easier is to have a sponsor. My cousin is married to a Korean and he has sponsored some of her family. I do not know all of the technicalities or details but the way it was explained to me in the simplest of form was by sponsoring them he was stating that if they could not support themselves then he would step in and do so, the Government would have no expenses for them. Being that they were all hard workers and did support themselves it was non issue for my cousin.
Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 7:36am
Yes, that is another way, you are right. It still takes forever as far as I know.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2009
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 7:49am
Yes, I do not think that having a sponsor actually shortens the process for full citizenship, but makes some of the earlier steps (temporary legal status) easier to obtain.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 9:24am

Why the change, again?


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 9:25am

Why yes, it is.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 9:26am

Yep.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 10:28am
???
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 10:28am
Interesting. Why would you think that?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 10:30am

WHEN and WHERE did I EVER say the person IME had "no computer experience in another language while working 10-12 hour days doing manual labor"?

FYI he speaks english and is VERY experienced with the computer-lol!!! He also was not working at the time because he could not get a job without being a citizen. He was lucky at the time that his partner was able to do the supporting while he got his citizenship.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Fri, 05-29-2009 - 10:31am
Really? Who is this person?

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