Should I stay or should I go?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2009
Should I stay or should I go?
1679
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 2:36pm

Hi ladies! it is so nice to be here and vent vent vent vent!!! I would like to share with you guys what is been BOTHERING me for a while now.

I'm 30 my husband is 50 (doesn't look like 50 AT ALL!) we have a 1 year old boy.

We both have good jobs (diferent cities) we've live in different states since we met. I don't like what I do and I would like to change my career and go back again to Graduate School for another major.

I am an engineer and he is an economist, I want to go back to school for a PhD in Psychology, but first I want to stay at home with my baby until he is ready to go to school and then I could go back to school. This sound like a plan since DH is getting a FANTASTIC job . I mean good benefits, good money, very nice city, etc etc etc.

The problem is:

To do so I have to leave my job and I am scared to death!!! what if we don't work out very well? I will be regreting all my life having left a good job. What I would do if we divorce? Start from zero homeless?

Since he is going to be the one making the money how does that is going to work out? He says he will support me always, and he's been trying to convince me to stay at home with our baby but I've been reluctant (reason why we live in diferent cities) to the idea of not having my own money. He is a very generous man, but with a bit of mood swings. We will be living together for the first time since tomorrow,( since he is in academia he is coming to spend the whole summer here at my city ) I guess I will take it from there and see how we work out as a couple.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 1:36pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 1:37pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 1:38pm
Yes being up North is not like non-stop humidity like Florida. We still have our weeks (my mother only remembers a week-lol!!) of hot, humid weather that you need an ac.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 1:40pm
My area has had a problem for awhile. It doesn't go away when these illegal's make more money working off the books than on so they don't bother getting a green card.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 1:42pm
It IS a big job. My dh got out 4 bushes and the chainsaw won't work right so the last one is half done-lol!! We have been soaking the roots and hopefully that job won't be TOO huge-lol!! Then we have 5 things to plant--a dwarf (cherry) weeping willow, 2 ornamental grasses, a pom pom topiary and a spiral topiary. Can't WAIT until it is all done as it is going to look so nice and "modern" :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 4:28pm
social liberal.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 9:31pm

My son has been working as an independent contractor for several years for a company that requires that he have insurance and sign waivers in order to contract with him. He has insurance to cover him if he were hurt. He is not bonded or licensed, but as far as I am aware of, there is no requirement in my state that people who mow lawns for other people become licensed.

There is nothing that would keep a professional landscaper from suing a homeowner if he or she were insured on a homeowner's property because of the homeowner's negligence.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 9:34pm
Being an illegal immigrant does not keep you from paying all taxes, but it might keep you working off the books. Which would mean that those guys are likely less insured than my son, whom several people seem to be in a bit of a swivet about. Evidently breaking the law by hiring illegal labor doesn't seem to bother your neighbors.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 10:05pm

You may want to check with Forlinis before you post again, because you missed the part that you are just concerned with the exploitation of the day laborer and protecting the American taxpayer from unfair labor practices of ruthless businesses and the unprotected underclass.

Because this post just points to your judgment by solely by color of skin and willingness to work on days "real" Americans would not.

Just sayin...

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sun, 05-24-2009 - 10:13pm

Hey, while we're both here -- I am going out of town for a few days, so would you mind being me until I get back?

You can do it remotely so you don't have to move to the midwest.

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