Should I stay or should I go?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2009
Should I stay or should I go?
1679
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 2:36pm

Hi ladies! it is so nice to be here and vent vent vent vent!!! I would like to share with you guys what is been BOTHERING me for a while now.

I'm 30 my husband is 50 (doesn't look like 50 AT ALL!) we have a 1 year old boy.

We both have good jobs (diferent cities) we've live in different states since we met. I don't like what I do and I would like to change my career and go back again to Graduate School for another major.

I am an engineer and he is an economist, I want to go back to school for a PhD in Psychology, but first I want to stay at home with my baby until he is ready to go to school and then I could go back to school. This sound like a plan since DH is getting a FANTASTIC job . I mean good benefits, good money, very nice city, etc etc etc.

The problem is:

To do so I have to leave my job and I am scared to death!!! what if we don't work out very well? I will be regreting all my life having left a good job. What I would do if we divorce? Start from zero homeless?

Since he is going to be the one making the money how does that is going to work out? He says he will support me always, and he's been trying to convince me to stay at home with our baby but I've been reluctant (reason why we live in diferent cities) to the idea of not having my own money. He is a very generous man, but with a bit of mood swings. We will be living together for the first time since tomorrow,( since he is in academia he is coming to spend the whole summer here at my city ) I guess I will take it from there and see how we work out as a couple.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 8:41pm

Refresh my memory. Where did Coco indicate any empathy for the "terrible problem affecting the vulnerable"? Because I read her response to me in post 520 somewhat differently. Did I miss some nuance that you read?

"They are taking away from the American citizens who could be working but it is cheaper for the landscapers to pay them off the books when they need them and not someone who will be paid on the books on a steady basis."

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 8:44pm
OT but, I thought you said you were taking a break from the bord?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 9:18pm
lol :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 9:19pm
Thanks. I DO know what I am talking about though. Think some have figured that out already ;)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 9:21pm
There really is NO debate about this :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 9:21pm
True :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 9:26pm

I did? It's tough to get old, that short term memory loss problem.

Can you refresh my memory? When did I leave and when did I say I'd be back, because...surprise, I'm back?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 9:27pm

I am NOT racial in ANY way but "Americans" are NOT standing on the corner everyday waiting for a landscaper or construction truck to come and pick them up for work.


I can understand if you are not used to seeing this and thinking someone is making a "judgement". I have seen this every single week for years at any day or time and any weather.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 9:28pm
Not seeing it first hand makes it harder to understand.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2009
Tue, 05-26-2009 - 9:29pm
:)

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