Should I stay or should I go?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2009
Should I stay or should I go?
1679
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 2:36pm

Hi ladies! it is so nice to be here and vent vent vent vent!!! I would like to share with you guys what is been BOTHERING me for a while now.

I'm 30 my husband is 50 (doesn't look like 50 AT ALL!) we have a 1 year old boy.

We both have good jobs (diferent cities) we've live in different states since we met. I don't like what I do and I would like to change my career and go back again to Graduate School for another major.

I am an engineer and he is an economist, I want to go back to school for a PhD in Psychology, but first I want to stay at home with my baby until he is ready to go to school and then I could go back to school. This sound like a plan since DH is getting a FANTASTIC job . I mean good benefits, good money, very nice city, etc etc etc.

The problem is:

To do so I have to leave my job and I am scared to death!!! what if we don't work out very well? I will be regreting all my life having left a good job. What I would do if we divorce? Start from zero homeless?

Since he is going to be the one making the money how does that is going to work out? He says he will support me always, and he's been trying to convince me to stay at home with our baby but I've been reluctant (reason why we live in diferent cities) to the idea of not having my own money. He is a very generous man, but with a bit of mood swings. We will be living together for the first time since tomorrow,( since he is in academia he is coming to spend the whole summer here at my city ) I guess I will take it from there and see how we work out as a couple.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2009
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 12:50pm

Can you repeat the answer, or link it?

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2007
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:22pm

>> So, I guess, IMO, I would be focusing on what I really wanted. <<

I think when you have kids, making entirely selfish decisions is harder to do.

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Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?

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Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2007
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:24pm

>> The dynamics of a close-distance and a long-distance relationships are different. <<

Ain't that the truth. My DH and I were LD for 9 months before he moved here, and we had a very rough time for several months after he arrived. I have the same concerns for the OP as you do.

++++++++++++++++++

Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?

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Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2007
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:27pm
LMAO - I'd rather more people NOT learn to file suits in court... the court system is impacted enough as it is!!

++++++++++++++++++

Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?

++++++++++++++++++

Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2007
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:28pm

>> Pre-K is free in public schools, i do not think private. You have to get a voucher thru the school board. Get the voucher and pre-K is no cost. <<

This must vary district to district and state to state. We have no such system where I live. You can either pay for preschool/pre-K or if you qualify for Head Start, you can send your child there.

++++++++++++++++++

Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?

++++++++++++++++++

Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2007
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:30pm

>> never IME, if you are not 5 by sept first you do not go to kdg, no exception, nothing to do with budget. It is Law. <<

And this varies district by district too. In mine, you can start K at age 4 if you will be 5 by November 30. My YDS barely got in under the deadline.

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Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?

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Why hide your light under a bushel of bears, I ask you?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:32pm

<

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:34pm

Can I ask what state this is?


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:37pm

Our cutoff is July 31st or August 1st, but kindergarten is not required.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2009
Wed, 05-20-2009 - 1:38pm

"never IME, if you are not 5 by sept first you do not go to kdg, no exception, nothing to do with budget. It is Law. IME."

These laws on school age vary by state.

In the frequently relevant (to so many debates on Ivillage) words of Inigio Montoya from The Princess Bride "You keep using that

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