so sick of hearing....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
so sick of hearing....
1991
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 1:34pm
hello everyone!! i just read the cnn article on how burnt out and guilty the working mom is...and how hard it is to incorparate "quality" time...and all i can say is WILL YOU COME OFF IT PLEASE!! i work-40 hours a week; sometimes 6 days a week to get all my hours...and i have 2 children-7 and 3...and you know what-every day during the school year, i walk my dd to school...i volunteer at my dds school-in her classroom and on field trips-i have the last 2 years and plan to do more of the same this coming year...i keep the house clean-do the dishes and laundry, go grocery shopping, etc. and you know what-neither of my kids feel slighted. we just took a week long vacation where we went to an amusement park and then to visit my sil for a few days...they have a lil shallow pool-and i go "swimming" with them often-usually before i go off to the adult world of work...we go on shopping trips with my mom and visit a cousin who has a huge pool and the adults play cards outside on the deck when the kids swim...we play games, we take walks, we go to parks...it just boggles my mind. yes i get tired-and yes there are days i wish i didnt have to go in to work...but then theres days that i cant wait until i go in-some women are meant to stay at home and theyre happy doing it...and some women are meant to work outside the home-i need that adult stimulation-i need my friends and my friends are all behind that deli counter with me...again i dont feel my kids are slighted in the least-my own mom was a stay at homer and she didnt volunteer at school and we never took the kinds of trips and outings my kids are lucky enough to have on a regular basis...i dont feel guilty when im at work-i dont think being a working mom hurts my kids...im getting sick and tired of hearing how unhappy working moms are, or how guilty i should feel cuz im not with my kids 24/7...maybe im the exception...or maybe the media focuses too much on the exceptions and a lot of working mommies feel like me...??? take care!!
joanne
maman2goons@yahoo.com

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 11:28am
It is not a matter of the child not being able to deal with it. It is a matter of what it will do to the child to think that is what school is supposed to be all about. Personally, I also object to schools that make it necessary for me to home school on top of the school day.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 11:32am
i have not blamed the school for anything my child couldnt deal with, she was doing great in the public school in texas, i as the parent, did not feel the school was doing a good job and i hated the way they did their nclb testing, it dominated the school year. i still maintain my child was not a good fit for the school we had her in and so we did get out. is it the schools fault it wasnt a good fit, no, is the way the texas dept of education chooses to run their schools their fault, absolutely.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2007
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 11:54am

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How contradictory can you get? Here you say "if you don't like it,move on." But just a couple posts ago you were spouting that peoople who moved their children because it's wasn't the right school for them were creating stigmas and acting as if moving children from one school to another was such an awful thing to do.

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No one said it was. In fact, by moving the child to a different school, the PARENT fixed the problem and relieved the school of any responsiblity for doing so.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 12:02pm

I have heard that and I, myself, tried to make it work for the better part of 15 years. How many more years of my life (and my children's) should I have given up?

I find it sad all around that one would "stay for the children". Kids would be much better off in 2 separate households where EACH parent is happier.

Carole

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 12:29pm
I'd say if you have a situation in any school with a kid or group of kids that are consistently bored, you have a situation that needs fixing. Maybe it's the kid, maybe it's the setting, maybe it's the teacher. But whatever, it needs fixing. I wouldn't send my kid to school for six or seven hours a day and be satisfied if he were consistently bored.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 12:37pm

Who has stated that the school should fix the problem?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 12:47pm

>>she was doing great in the public school in texas, i as the parent, did not feel the school was doing a good job and i hated the way they did their nclb testing...<<

this is exactly what i'm talking about. a bias created about public schools in general because of one experience...kids will excel in public school because their attitudes are different. and nclb isn't the only reason taks exists. catholic schools have their own standard testing children are expected to meet and pass,too. at the elementary level,a friend told me it's "sat" (i forget what it stands for but it's not the same scholastic aptitude testing as in h.s.).

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 12:56pm

there are few people i know irl who pull their kids out of one setting,place them in another and fault the school/teachers for it. with the exception of this board,of course...parents know from the begining what school is the right fit for their child. i.e. the montessori parent who believes in the philosophy of that education have started and continued that education from the begining (at prek or k) as do many catholic school families,too.

do you know many students/families who try your college then drop out because tehy determine it to be the wrong fit?




Edited 8/31/2007 1:02 pm ET by egd3blessed

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 12:59pm
I don't find that my friends children (who are in public school) have different attitudes about school.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Fri, 08-31-2007 - 1:01pm
I don't know what the numbers are, but there are a few kids who leave every year to transfer to a different kind of school. The difference is, though, that when you choose a college, you tend to choose one that you think will be a good fit for you. When you are assigned to a public school, it may or may not be a good fit for an individual child.

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