so sick of hearing....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
so sick of hearing....
1991
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 1:34pm
hello everyone!! i just read the cnn article on how burnt out and guilty the working mom is...and how hard it is to incorparate "quality" time...and all i can say is WILL YOU COME OFF IT PLEASE!! i work-40 hours a week; sometimes 6 days a week to get all my hours...and i have 2 children-7 and 3...and you know what-every day during the school year, i walk my dd to school...i volunteer at my dds school-in her classroom and on field trips-i have the last 2 years and plan to do more of the same this coming year...i keep the house clean-do the dishes and laundry, go grocery shopping, etc. and you know what-neither of my kids feel slighted. we just took a week long vacation where we went to an amusement park and then to visit my sil for a few days...they have a lil shallow pool-and i go "swimming" with them often-usually before i go off to the adult world of work...we go on shopping trips with my mom and visit a cousin who has a huge pool and the adults play cards outside on the deck when the kids swim...we play games, we take walks, we go to parks...it just boggles my mind. yes i get tired-and yes there are days i wish i didnt have to go in to work...but then theres days that i cant wait until i go in-some women are meant to stay at home and theyre happy doing it...and some women are meant to work outside the home-i need that adult stimulation-i need my friends and my friends are all behind that deli counter with me...again i dont feel my kids are slighted in the least-my own mom was a stay at homer and she didnt volunteer at school and we never took the kinds of trips and outings my kids are lucky enough to have on a regular basis...i dont feel guilty when im at work-i dont think being a working mom hurts my kids...im getting sick and tired of hearing how unhappy working moms are, or how guilty i should feel cuz im not with my kids 24/7...maybe im the exception...or maybe the media focuses too much on the exceptions and a lot of working mommies feel like me...??? take care!!
joanne
maman2goons@yahoo.com

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2003
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 1:43pm

I agree.

 

Shari mother to

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 1:49pm

O.K. I know I am so late posting on this thread, but I can't take it anymore!! I actually came out of "lurkdom" just to comment here. WHY does everyone keep focusing on children's immediate needs..i.e. "as long as you can put a roof over your child's head and food on the table and provide the necessities, you should not work" Good God! Has anyone ever considered MORE than immediate needs, such as being able to provide for yourself in retirement so that you won't have to depend on your children for support when you are older, providing support for them in college, so they won't have to start their lives out in debt, maybe being able to provide them with an inheritance later in life?
Also, what's with this "go to work once they are in school" mentality?? I personally plan to scale back once my little ones are school age, because that is when they will need me most when they are pre-teens and teenagers!! I want to be able to work less and provide MORE supervision during those critical years....not just be getting back into the workforce!

Finally, in regards to 1/2 million dollar homes and luxury cars.....I hope whoever posted that comment realizes that in some parts of the country 1/2 million dollars barely buys you a condo/townhouse in a fair to middlin' school district. Oh, and our Escalade...my husband bought it on HIS salary as a "mid-life" gift to himself. So my working mom dollars did NOT contribute to our luxury vehicle.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2003
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 1:49pm

I have answered this but will do so one more time.

 

Shari mother to

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 1:55pm

<<We do invest in retirement funds.>>


I think the question was, fully funded, not if you invested or not.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 1:59pm

So you are only addressing quality time versus quantity of time with a child?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 2:02pm

<<

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 2:04pm

<<What I was trying to say is that for me I don't get a break or get time away from the kids while I'm at work.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2003
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 2:05pm

I said that the daycare has a two hour max.

 

Shari mother to

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 2:07pm
O.K. this is a whole other post, but I (and I believe many others) would really take issue with your expectation for your children to join the military or figure out their own way to attend college. For me and my family, education is sacred, given that we are of an ethnic/cultural background that was denied the right and privilege of an education. My parents sacrificed a lot to provide not only college but advanced degrees for my siblings and I, and we believe that education is the most important gift that we can afford our children. I hope your children share your belief that spending all day with you as toddlers is a good trade-off for not having to finance their own college education. Especially since it is increasingly difficult to gain entry to most jobs without a basic college education these days.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 2:09pm

I'm sorry that I missed your previous answers, I have read the thread and really only remember brief answers.


<<I don't get my hair and nails done anymore, we live in a 100 year old home instead of a new one, both our van and car are over 10 years old, we don't eat out, I do much of our clothes shopping at garage sales instead of buying new, instead of fancy vacations we borrow my grandparents camper and take the kids camping, I'm sure there are more but these are some that I can think of off the top of my head.

PumpkinAngel

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