so sick of hearing....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
so sick of hearing....
1991
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 1:34pm
hello everyone!! i just read the cnn article on how burnt out and guilty the working mom is...and how hard it is to incorparate "quality" time...and all i can say is WILL YOU COME OFF IT PLEASE!! i work-40 hours a week; sometimes 6 days a week to get all my hours...and i have 2 children-7 and 3...and you know what-every day during the school year, i walk my dd to school...i volunteer at my dds school-in her classroom and on field trips-i have the last 2 years and plan to do more of the same this coming year...i keep the house clean-do the dishes and laundry, go grocery shopping, etc. and you know what-neither of my kids feel slighted. we just took a week long vacation where we went to an amusement park and then to visit my sil for a few days...they have a lil shallow pool-and i go "swimming" with them often-usually before i go off to the adult world of work...we go on shopping trips with my mom and visit a cousin who has a huge pool and the adults play cards outside on the deck when the kids swim...we play games, we take walks, we go to parks...it just boggles my mind. yes i get tired-and yes there are days i wish i didnt have to go in to work...but then theres days that i cant wait until i go in-some women are meant to stay at home and theyre happy doing it...and some women are meant to work outside the home-i need that adult stimulation-i need my friends and my friends are all behind that deli counter with me...again i dont feel my kids are slighted in the least-my own mom was a stay at homer and she didnt volunteer at school and we never took the kinds of trips and outings my kids are lucky enough to have on a regular basis...i dont feel guilty when im at work-i dont think being a working mom hurts my kids...im getting sick and tired of hearing how unhappy working moms are, or how guilty i should feel cuz im not with my kids 24/7...maybe im the exception...or maybe the media focuses too much on the exceptions and a lot of working mommies feel like me...??? take care!!
joanne
maman2goons@yahoo.com

Pages

Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 8:23pm
oh man the last bottle, the last diaper, the last night in the crib -- I was SO happy for those -- liza was a really difficult baby who has morphed into a charming kid and I was one of those moms who CHEERED as every bit of babyhood fell by the wayside!

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-04-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 8:52pm

I am sure you are completely right to feel that your children are better off at home with you when they are young. Parents usually can tell what is best for their kids and what does not work. At five your children could be better equipped to go to school than they were at a younger age. Some children do not do well in day care. So far mine have thrived in the day care setting. If this changed we would change our situation.

I also don't think it is wrong to expect your children to make their own way when it comes to higher education. I used to think the same. I made my own way through two degrees and I saw a lot of other students wasting their parent’s money. After having my kids I changed my mind but I can still understand your point. They are more likely to see the value in the education if they have to work for it. I will probably require my children work a little so they will appreciate it. They will probably have to anyway!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-04-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 8:58pm
I didn't think you meant you used day care for a certain number of hours. That would be making an assumption. I did not feel mislead by your comment at all.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:15pm

Not to mention name brand recognition and "But, everyone has (insert newest/latest gadget here)."

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:32pm

Joy tried to join the Navy but she is highly allergic to wool. So no dice.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:39pm

That is decided at the state level and every state is different. Back when I was homeschooling, in the 1980's, AZ's (for example, it's one I remember) age was 8 yo. CA has always been, as far as I know, 6yo before Dec 2nd. That means 1st grade, not Kindergarten. Yet most people send their children to Kindy. Kindergarten was started, I believe, during WWII because so many moms were working for the war effort. Dh didn't go to Kindergarten (Nebraska). I did (Iowa). By now, Kindergarten has become the norm for our society.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:45pm

I had forgotten about the asthma. I only remembered the wool test that we did.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:49pm

Just wait until you get to the first wedding, the first grandchild. I tell you adult children are well worth the 18+ years of effort to get here.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 9:56pm

Hang in there. In the long run, it's the later "firsts" that are so much more important. The first time Erica actually got up in front of strangers and gave a speech at 9th grade graduation; the first time Joy got pregnant and then had her miscarriage and went on to have 2 wonderful children (can you tell that I'm a doting grandmother?); the time that Dylan got an award and remembered to tell me before the ceremony so that I could attend. These are events that both my children and I and dh remember together. As far as the early firsts go, you may or may not see them. Sah is no guarantee of that. Nor as the years go by and there are so many other first, you might not remember them anyway. Your children certainly won't.

BTW, my children are now 29, 27, 23, and 9. I have, at various times, woh, sah, and wah and been gone 12 hours between work and commute.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2007
Tue, 08-21-2007 - 11:11pm
Don't let it get to you. I think some people just think Dr. Laura is more than a good propagandist. :)

Pages