so sick of hearing....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
so sick of hearing....
1991
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 1:34pm
hello everyone!! i just read the cnn article on how burnt out and guilty the working mom is...and how hard it is to incorparate "quality" time...and all i can say is WILL YOU COME OFF IT PLEASE!! i work-40 hours a week; sometimes 6 days a week to get all my hours...and i have 2 children-7 and 3...and you know what-every day during the school year, i walk my dd to school...i volunteer at my dds school-in her classroom and on field trips-i have the last 2 years and plan to do more of the same this coming year...i keep the house clean-do the dishes and laundry, go grocery shopping, etc. and you know what-neither of my kids feel slighted. we just took a week long vacation where we went to an amusement park and then to visit my sil for a few days...they have a lil shallow pool-and i go "swimming" with them often-usually before i go off to the adult world of work...we go on shopping trips with my mom and visit a cousin who has a huge pool and the adults play cards outside on the deck when the kids swim...we play games, we take walks, we go to parks...it just boggles my mind. yes i get tired-and yes there are days i wish i didnt have to go in to work...but then theres days that i cant wait until i go in-some women are meant to stay at home and theyre happy doing it...and some women are meant to work outside the home-i need that adult stimulation-i need my friends and my friends are all behind that deli counter with me...again i dont feel my kids are slighted in the least-my own mom was a stay at homer and she didnt volunteer at school and we never took the kinds of trips and outings my kids are lucky enough to have on a regular basis...i dont feel guilty when im at work-i dont think being a working mom hurts my kids...im getting sick and tired of hearing how unhappy working moms are, or how guilty i should feel cuz im not with my kids 24/7...maybe im the exception...or maybe the media focuses too much on the exceptions and a lot of working mommies feel like me...??? take care!!
joanne
maman2goons@yahoo.com

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2004
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:13pm

All very good points. IMO, it isn't necessarily inconsistent to say you want the best for your kids and then to say that you will not be financing their education. Many people see paying their own way through school as a positive. Many saw classmates who wasted their parents' money, seemingly without a care, while attending college. I am not a big fan of extremes in any part of my life and college financing is no exception. So in our family we are somewhere in the middle, lol. Dh and I split the costs about equally with each of our kids for their education. It was very manageable for them working in the summer and during school breaks and IMO, they felt more "vested" in their education.

My concern would be that a MSAH might discover too late that their kids do need their help with college and at that point would be too far behind to do anything about it. Speaking from experience, scholarships are very few and far between and I think most people would be shocked by the level of income a parent needs to qualify for need based assistance.

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2007
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:18pm
Thanks - I know I get so caught up in right now, that I forget what lies ahead. I know there are plenty more good times to come! I guess I just want to be his main influence right now, not the babysitter.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2004
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:20pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2004
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:22pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2004
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:23pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2004
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:26pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:26pm
It's easy to say someone shouldn't feel guilty, but it's much harder to actually not feel guilty. It's kind of like worrying-- when someone tells me that I worry too much, I just worry about worrying. It's kind of the same with guilt for me-- I just feel guilty for feeling guilty. LOL!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:27pm

Yes, this is a debate board and as part of that debate, I'm asking her why she feels entitled to have an opinion about how someone else lives their life, let alone declare one way better.


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Curious, how do you know this?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2004
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:31pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 1:38pm

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That's irrelevant and I'm still asking why she feels that she can decide how other people live and state one way is better than the other.

PumpkinAngel

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