so sick of hearing....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
so sick of hearing....
1991
Mon, 08-06-2007 - 1:34pm
hello everyone!! i just read the cnn article on how burnt out and guilty the working mom is...and how hard it is to incorparate "quality" time...and all i can say is WILL YOU COME OFF IT PLEASE!! i work-40 hours a week; sometimes 6 days a week to get all my hours...and i have 2 children-7 and 3...and you know what-every day during the school year, i walk my dd to school...i volunteer at my dds school-in her classroom and on field trips-i have the last 2 years and plan to do more of the same this coming year...i keep the house clean-do the dishes and laundry, go grocery shopping, etc. and you know what-neither of my kids feel slighted. we just took a week long vacation where we went to an amusement park and then to visit my sil for a few days...they have a lil shallow pool-and i go "swimming" with them often-usually before i go off to the adult world of work...we go on shopping trips with my mom and visit a cousin who has a huge pool and the adults play cards outside on the deck when the kids swim...we play games, we take walks, we go to parks...it just boggles my mind. yes i get tired-and yes there are days i wish i didnt have to go in to work...but then theres days that i cant wait until i go in-some women are meant to stay at home and theyre happy doing it...and some women are meant to work outside the home-i need that adult stimulation-i need my friends and my friends are all behind that deli counter with me...again i dont feel my kids are slighted in the least-my own mom was a stay at homer and she didnt volunteer at school and we never took the kinds of trips and outings my kids are lucky enough to have on a regular basis...i dont feel guilty when im at work-i dont think being a working mom hurts my kids...im getting sick and tired of hearing how unhappy working moms are, or how guilty i should feel cuz im not with my kids 24/7...maybe im the exception...or maybe the media focuses too much on the exceptions and a lot of working mommies feel like me...??? take care!!
joanne
maman2goons@yahoo.com

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 9:50pm

"Why take the money out of savings where it is earning interest if I have a family member that can borrow it for free and I will pay it back? "

So a family member should loose interest on their money so you don't have to.

"The other time was for she helped me buy food for DS birthday party which happens to be right after Christmas, she offered to help I could have probably done it but would have been really broke for a few weeks."

I am assuming that the fact that your DS birthday is right after Christmas is no surprise. That is not an emergency and could have been budgeted for ahead of time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2007
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 9:51pm
Give me an... M! Give me a B! Give me an A! Give me an N! Give me a C! What's that spell? Yayyyyyyyyyy... debate board! LOL
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 9:52pm

Ah, I don't do any those things now as a wm. So it would not be any hardship to give them up in order to sah.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 9:54pm

I'm so glad that I read ahead this time.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2007
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 9:56pm
I find that the most entertaining are the ones with child(ren) under 2. They always think they know everything, but usually know almost nothing. Kind of like teenagers. I'm not excepting myself here, I was the same way.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 9:57pm

Don't worry, you are. Take it from us BTDT moms, you and dh are the major influences in your children's lives, even when they are teens and it doesn't seem like it.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2004
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 9:58pm

I would have a big problem taking money from a relative to save myself the loss of interest on the money from my savings. Wouldn't the money borrowed be losing interest for the relative? I have willingly helped my son when he had car trouble and was short on cash, but he was 17 at the time.

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2006
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 10:01pm

And nobody here does this, to my knowledge.

What is extra? I don't work for extras, I work for self-fulfillment, I work for our long-term financial health, I work because my family benefits from it.

I've had excellent childcare in the past: dad, grandmothers, nanny, and preschool teachers, as well as myself. I pretty sure my children know who cares for them

Huh? What a very strange statement. I am a woman. I supported myself prior to marriage, but I am in a committed, cooperative relationship in this family. Does your DH "stand on his own two feet"? Does he need to work to prove himself to you? I'm guessing no, so you don't HAVE to work to support the family. For me and dh and my family, strict gender roles have not defined our contributions to our family, either financially or in parenting responsibilities. We've both been a sah, woh and wah at various times.

Shrug. Your idea of family is very foreign to me and dh, and I would debate your choice, but not condemn it.

Edited 8/22/2007 10:06 pm ET by currieri




Edited 8/22/2007 10:25 pm ET by currieri
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2004
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 10:04pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Wed, 08-22-2007 - 10:11pm

For my family, going to the library is a necessity, not a luxury. So if sah meant that we couldn't afford to go, I would go back to work. Same with going to museums, reenactments, MCRD to visit the Marine Corp museum, going to the Indian Reservation to see their Pow Wow. The last vacation I took, was to Joy's in Phoenix for the birth of my 2nd grandchild. I went alone; everyone else stayed home.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

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