honestly? I think this is our country's obsession with materialism at its worst. What matters to me are the people in my life not the value of any gifst they may give me. when i got divorced some of my friends threw me a "starting over' shower and gave me everything from tupperware to plates to utenils to glasses -- pretty much all of which came from Target and probably none of which cost more than $30 but what I remember is not the gifts themselves but the fact that my friends wanted to help me out. The gifts I received at my actual wedding hold sentimental value for me but while I don't remember who gave me a place setting of china I do remember the unique gifts like the Lenox tree topper I put on my tree each year or the silly little basket I use to hold my mail. I don't remember who gave us money..
and when kelly and I get married I hope to say to our friends that we want to celebrate THEM at a big party at which Kelly and I will just happen to be married but we want to celebrate those people who love us and who we love and have them be with us for that special moment. The best wedding I ever went to was my best friends 2nd marriage which was billed as her 30th birthday party and int he middle of the party she and her now husband got married -- perfect!
Yes. We. Did.
This is how much we usually give for gifts:
Kids bday parties-$20Family bday parties-$30-$50Showers-$30-$100Christenings, communions, confirmation-$50-$100Weddings (haven't been to one in 5 years but invited to 2 this year)-$300
I got a $50 check at my wedding that bounced. I thought that was horrible because everyone knew 2 years before about our wedding.
I got a $50 check at my wedding that bounced. I thought that was horrible because everyone knew 2 years before about our wedding.>
Do you realize that you didn't answer a single question from the post.
A simple yes or no will do.
What I have learned from these threads is that materialism and "score keeping" is ugly!! Personal relationships should not be affected by the gift itself but by the thought. When dh and I married, a dear friend of mine from high school attended. Her gift to us was the sweetest, framed picture of she and I trying on wedding dresses in a department store when we were 16. To this day, it is the most cherished gift that I received. Some who have posted in this thread would probably be mortified that she didn't "cover her plate".
I do think that it can be "too much". When it becomes expected that each guest will hand the bride an envelope with an expected amount inside my skin begins to crawl!
The weddings that you are attending should not be a financial hardship to you or your family. I would give what you can comfortably give and not give it a second thought.
Sorry just a little testy because we have two weddings back to back weekends 3 hours away and we were going to take vacation the week after the first wedding because my DCP is taking vacation.
<we have a budget set up for *gifts* in general but how much i spend varies from the very low end to the very high end depending on the interest in mind of the person i'm buying for. >
Okay so how much you spend matters?