Spinoff thread. Gifts how much is too

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2003
Spinoff thread. Gifts how much is too
1403
Tue, 06-26-2007 - 11:47am

much?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 9:52pm

I know how much a cash bar costs... especially for my friends and family! But it's mandatory in my circles. A cash bar would cause a riot, lol.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 9:54pm
I totally understand that. I am a BIG planner of things so I do plan my dinners. I guess I just would not be that upset if someone brought something else too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 9:55pm
The way it sounded like something extra that someone would bring would ruin the dinner that was planned sounded stuffy to me. My meals are planned to if someone comes over but I wouldn't be upset if someone brought an appetizer or dessert with them. It is not like they are bringing another main dish.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 9:57pm
I guess you don't understand like we do unless you have gone to parties on LI-lol!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 9:57pm

I went to a prom at fox hollow. I can't remember whose it was, though. Talk about drinking for 5 hours.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 9:59pm
Drinking at a prom??!! I guess I was pretty boring as we did not drink before, during or after our prom.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 10:04pm

Yes but if the dinner is planned so that *everything* on the menu complements each other, cant you see how that would kind of mess up the dinner plan of the hostess?

I just dont get the presumptiousness of going against the wishes of the host when one attends a dinner or party. Why not just bring a bottle of wine or flowers if you absolutely MUST bring something?

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2005
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 10:07pm

I would if it really was a big deal. I have never gone to someone's home though that they just did not accept any extra food but their own.

I guess here it is just a gracious thing to do and always bring something to dinner. Some others have agreed as they have been to people's homes on LI for dinner and always bring something.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 10:07pm

I went to college in Providence and I've been to a bunch of weddings in RI and MA. They all had open bars. These weren't yuppie latecomers, these were lifetime New Englanders. And I'd never call the weddings ostentatious. They were lovely.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 10:08pm

I wouldnt be *upset* if someone brought something. But I would wonder why they took it upon themselves to bring something *after* they asked and I said no thank you. I'd wonder at the rudeness of it. I would also smile, say *how wonderful* and add it to the table, understanding that the bringers intentions were good. Its not that I dont appreciate the gesture-it just seems a bit pushy to ignore my *no thank you*.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

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