Why is it insulting? My parents paid for my entire wedding. All my mil paid for was the rehearsal dinner. For my sister's wedding, my parents paid some, my sister paid some and her in-laws paid some.
I understand that then. At my catering hall it was one price that was paid in increments and then one last payment that evening after a taly was taken of how many people showed up.
Why? Every wedding I have been to has had an open bar. Most parties in homes have alcohol too. Never seen a problem with it as long as you are not driving at the end of the night.
They had people driving them or they stopped drinking long before it was time to go home. My dh always stops an hour and a half before we leave any place and eats something at that time.
He was joking. But while we will definitely plan to pay for our dds' weddings (to a certain extent!), unless the bride's parents can't afford to pay for the dd's wedding, I'm sure we will follow tradition and pay for the rehearsal dinner. Who knows, that's a long way off.
I think you should decide what your budget allows, be it mineral water, Kool-Aid, soda, wine, or an open bar, and then let your guests have all they want for free. If they drink up all your wine, then that's because you didn't buy enough.
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