There are already enough children in the world.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
There are already enough children in the world.
473
Thu, 09-19-2013 - 3:59pm

Here's an article where 5 women explain why they chose not to have any children.  http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/5-women-explain-why-chose-not-kids-165300500.html

Did you ever think about not having children?  Like some of the women, would you have had more time to enjoy your husband?  Would you be divorced? Wink  Basically, why did you have children instead of not having children?

If you don't have time for the whole article, some of the reasons included 1.) having a fulfilling life already, 2.) growing up with dysfunctional parents or other close relatives/friends who were miserable because they had kids, 3.) getting to sleep in late, travel the world, not spend the money on kids, 4.) a biggie ~ not feeling the maternal impulse.

Would you life be as happy/fun/fulfilled if you hadn't had children?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
I do not know where anyone got the idea that I did not and do not do fun things with my kids just because I admit that there is some drudgery involved in parenting.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sat, 09-21-2013 - 9:34am
Friendship sometimes is exhausting and difficult. Most things that are worthwhile involve a degree if difficulty, I find.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998

mortyswife wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px">How do you figure that you have done almost all of that?  </span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">1. Last night I went to bed at midnight and was up at 5:15 to get my dd to swim practice.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">2. I have done many things with my dh after my kids read a book to me.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">3. I have been on 2 vacations without them. I didn't think </span></strong><strong><span style="font-size:13px">of the possibility of them being orphaned to hold me back and say I can't go because I have kids.</span></strong></p>

You were out until midnight last night?  

You had a glass a wine on the porch?

You are comparing a cruise to a trip to Egypt?  

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998

bordwithyou wrote:
My kids will tell you that they have had great childhoods; lots of gray experiences. You are right, for at least eighteen years their needs come first, and a lot of time their "wants" come first, too. There has been a lot of joy along the way and I wouldn't do anything differently in terms of the balance we achieved between kid/adult trips, opportunities, and activities. That does not change the fact that for me, it is less fun to spend a Saturday morning sitting at a supermarket table with my kid selling Boy Scout popcorn than it would be to spend that time antiquing or gardening or something like that.

I think that's honesty bord and not everyone likes to think of parenting in those terms, many prefer the rainbow and unicorn view.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Sat, 09-21-2013 - 9:36am

That does not change the fact that for me, it is less fun to spend a Saturday morning sitting at a supermarket table with my kid selling Boy Scout popcorn than it would be to spend that time antiquing or gardening or something like that.

Is that every weekend? 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sat, 09-21-2013 - 9:37am
I thought about the possibility of my kids being early orphaned because at the time we were offered the trip to Egypt, American tourists were being murdered there. It didn't stem worth the risk to me at the time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Sat, 09-21-2013 - 9:39am

I do not know where anyone got the idea that I did not and do not do fun things with my kids just because I admit that there is some drudgery involved in parenting.

No you said YOU were less fun because you had kids.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Sat, 09-21-2013 - 9:40am

You were out until midnight last night? 11pm, went to bed at 12

You had a glass a wine on the porch? Yep

You are comparing a cruise to a trip to Egypt?  It is a trip WITHOUT kids OUT of the country.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998

mortyswife wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px">I do not know where anyone got the idea that I did not and do not do fun things with my kids just because I admit that there is some drudgery involved in parenting.</span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">No you said YOU were less fun because you had kids.</span></strong></p>

Right and there were times that as a parent, I was less fun than I would be if I wasn't a parent....how it has leaped to no fun with the kids is kinda a mystery.  Perhaps it has something to do with the unicorns and fairy tales?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Sat, 09-21-2013 - 9:41am

I thought about the possibility of my kids being early orphaned because at the time we were offered the trip to Egypt, American tourists were being murdered there. It didn't stem worth the risk to me at the time.

What a leap. NOTHING happens anyplace else?

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