Thoughts

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
Thoughts
23
Mon, 09-29-2008 - 11:33am

I was at a wedding this weekend and was talking to my boyfriend's best friend's mother.

melissajune21.jpg picture by ambersspace


&nbs

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2006
In reply to: ladybugmak
Thu, 10-23-2008 - 9:49pm

Sounds like she is looking for validation for her choices. I think many times when women "give up their careers to raise children" they want people to agree with their decision, so they feel "right" in having given something up. Here's the thing though, we all give things up when we have kids. Some do give up careers, some give up spending as much time with friends, some give up their hobbies, some give up getting their hair and nails done every week. We all make decisions about what we are willing to give up for the betterment of our children, and in turn ourselves. As far as reading at 4, big deal. My oldest dd read at 4, and she went to daycare for 13 months, and she went to preschool, even when I wasn't working. My 2 dd's who I was home with full time have actually taken longer to read. So basically, she was using her anecdotal evidence to support her decision to stay home.

I find it to be a real slap in the face though. I have worked full time, part time, out of the house, from home, what ever was needed to ensure that we were taken care of. I don't consider myself to have sacrificed my children in order to work. I work in order to take the best care of my children that I can. If you can do that and not work, then go for it. If you can do that and work, then go for it. I think it is such a ridiculous, petty pi$$ing match for women to say snarky things like that to one another.

Besides, I am better than all of you because I work PT and homeschool my children...oh, and I go to school, too! (end sarcasm!)

"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift."
~Albert Einstein




Edited 10/23/2008 9:55 pm ET by momof3sprouts
"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." ~Albert Einstein
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2008
In reply to: ladybugmak
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 5:57pm
long day...I hear that

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
In reply to: ladybugmak
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 5:22pm
I think she meant to post to me but posted to you by accident... I could be wrong though. It's been a long day.

melissajune21.jpg picture by ambersspace


&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2008
In reply to: ladybugmak
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 4:42pm

confused


are you talking to me?

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
In reply to: ladybugmak
Wed, 10-01-2008 - 3:50pm
I think you meant to reply to the OP! Just flagging this with a caution sign so she'll see it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2008
In reply to: ladybugmak
Tue, 09-30-2008 - 11:08pm

I think she was being ridiculous and you handled it beautifully.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
In reply to: ladybugmak
Tue, 09-30-2008 - 6:17pm

So her "solution" was for you to quit your job, stay home with your child, and what, receive welfare? I'm sure she'd approve of you then. ;) That's why I said she wasn't reasonable.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
In reply to: ladybugmak
Tue, 09-30-2008 - 6:00pm
Well, honestly, from her tone I gathered that she was disapproving of my having a child out of wedlock (BF isn't DD's father), so of course in her eyes, I've done messed it all up. :-P

melissajune21.jpg picture by ambersspace


&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
In reply to: ladybugmak
Tue, 09-30-2008 - 3:43pm

Of course you were right. What baffles me is that the other woman seemed to expect you, as a single mom, to "give up your career for your child." And pay the bills with what?


She doesn't sound like a reasonable person to me and I think you were wise to walk away.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
In reply to: ladybugmak
Tue, 09-30-2008 - 10:19am

>All I care about is that he does lean to read, when doen't matter so much to me.<

Amen to that.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

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