In today's economy, how can U stay home?
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| Mon, 08-07-2006 - 2:46pm |
I am 33 and am basically now sadly coming to the conclusion that we just can't have kids. I just don't know how people do it. In order to afford our mortgage, my husband and I both have to work full-time. And we bought a home in the least expensive market we could find in proximity to our jobs, so we commute up to four hours a day to make this work.
However, we both agreed, long long ago that we would only have kids if we could raise them ourselves. We just can't in good conscience reconcile the idea of having children and then handing them off to some stranger who is making close to minimum wages to rear them, and who can't possibly care about them as much as we do. And what would be the point? We would miss all their development and "firsts" and wouldn't be a close family, and they would grow up with attachment issues due to rapidly changing daycare staffing. No, if we can't do it the right way, we don't want to do it at all. We feel it's selfish to have them because WE WANT them; we decided long ago only to have them if we felt we could give them a wonderful life filled with love, hope, and opportunity.
So I am getting up there in age now, and I don't see things changing. The only people I see around me having children are people who 1) have family who live close by and can take care of their kids, 2) rich people, or women who marry rich men to be more specific, and 3) people whose families help them out financially.
Is there a chance for two people like us to have a family, when we don't have any of the above advantages? It doesn't seem like it should be THIS impossible! We're both hard workers who make decent money TOGETHER. Separately, it's not enough, but together, it's a good amount.
HOW could we make it happen? I have heard that having children after 34 the risks just go up and up and up, that they may not be healthy...

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Nonsense. My post has a time/date stamp from when it was posted that proves exactly when I wrote it. Post #876. If you have your time set for your local time, you can easily see it was written in the middle of the night, US time.
When you responded to it is completely irrelevant, as your demand was nothing more than a thinly veiled slam about MY activities on the internet, not yours. Perhaps, rather than trying to slam me for the time I spend here, you might consider your own time, given you've twice as many posts on this board as I do.
Jennie
Jennie
Sabina
Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,
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But that's only possible if the child spends more than 16 hours a day/5 days a week with the DCP *or* more than 12 hours a day/7 days a week with a DCP.
And that just doesn't happen.
I don't raise my child the way I do for fear of something bad happening. It is, however, one of the many reasons I have for parenting the way I do.
You just said you don't raise your child for fear of something bad happening and then the second sentence says you do.
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