"Too young for daycare"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
"Too young for daycare"?
77
Wed, 02-13-2008 - 10:12pm

I was considering going to work full time starting in the fall, and when I told my mother she said that 1 year old is too young for Joe to be suddenly thrust into full time daycare. When I think of the combination of how his separation anxiety will be at its peak and the fact that he's never been in daycare, I agree that for him, under his circumstances, it might be much less of a shock if I wait until he's 2 years old (of course by then I might be having my next child and the whole thing will start over again, LOL).

But anyway, "too young for full-time daycare"? What do you consider to be too young for full-time daycare? I've always had the "6 weeks, then back to work" American expectation in my head, so this is actually a new thought for me.

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Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 02-18-2008 - 12:06pm

this brings to mind a funny moment Liza and I shared last night.

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Mon, 02-18-2008 - 12:08pm

I don't think you can really be sure that you created the need to be held by responding to the need to be held. Some kids, some PEOPLE, have more of a need to be physically close than others. I've been around babies and small children all my life. Some of 'em I affectionately term "velcro babies" because I swear they would be happier if they were attached about 22/7 to another human being. The good thing is that ALL grow out of it, and they grow out of it faster if their needs are met rather than ignored.

I just was with the family of one of my "velcro babies" recently. He's now in kindergarten. When he was small, he would scream the whole time he was not in his mother's arms. It was tiring for her, and what was more tiring was that everyone else would be on her about "spoiling him" by responding to his needs. Anyway, he's in kindergarten, we were together for an hour and a half (a dinner program) and the little guy was off playing in a corner with other kids and hardly even looked up at his mother. Even two years ago, that would have been imposible.

Avatar for 4thekids2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 02-18-2008 - 1:53pm

I so agree. My first was a very high needs baby and I refused to hold him all the time so he wouldn't be spoiled. By the time #2 came along I said if he needs held, I'll hold him. Funny he was my only baby that wasn't high needs,lol. He didn't care to be held all the time(weird since he's a cuddly guy at 9). I decided after baby #1 to do what they needed, took breaks when

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2006
Mon, 02-18-2008 - 5:52pm

Wow, lots of responses to your question.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2004
Tue, 02-19-2008 - 9:10am

We

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Tue, 02-19-2008 - 9:23am

curious why your mom placed you in a dc setting at the age of 3...i never needed to be placed in a dc setting but i suppose if mom needed one because she had to return to a job or something,i would adapt,too..i believe a lot of the how well a child does in dc (esp at an early age) has much to do with how well a parent handles it all,too.


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2004
Tue, 02-19-2008 - 10:04am

Life happened, my parents divorced and my mother had to work, my brother was a year younger and she said that is was harder for him than me, but I also think that has to do with our characters.


As an adult my mom has told me that the years that she was a SAHM were extremely hard for her, and that she felt lonely and isolated, this in turn affected hers and my dads relationship, and ultimately contributed to their divorce.


Just for the record, I have never felt like

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Tue, 02-19-2008 - 10:25am

"

Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 02-19-2008 - 10:31am
nice post.

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2004
Tue, 02-19-2008 - 11:01am

I just thought I'd make the point to make sure that it was clear that I wasn't torn from

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