Traditional roles, Are they really....
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Traditional roles, Are they really....
| Tue, 09-21-2004 - 9:04am |
healthy for women or men? Let me just preface this by saying I have been living in a traditional role my entire married life. Dh brings home the paycheck and I raise the kids. This past weekend we came from a family gathering that involved all the women working and all of the men sitting and watching sports. Frankly, I am sick of it.I am completely wiped out after those things! I have four kids, two of which are 3 and 5 and need to be supervised, so I am working twice as hard! Just this morning dh told me not to buy anything without clearing it with him first....bleck! I am beginning to feel as if the kids get short changed when families are traditional. Dads don't interact with their kids as much as they should. Moms get to feel like a slave to their families. I am beginning to feel as if it is best for families if the mom at least works part time because then the dh can be more active in parenting and keeping up the household. This is sort of a vent but a debate as well. I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts.~Lisa

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No one was asking him to not smoke around the kids when the boys were little. They were just starting to figure out how bad second hand smoke was. Over the years, we learned that this is not something you should do. You live and learn and change your behavior accordingly. Given all the research that came out in the 16 years from the time we married until we had dd#1, I have every reason to think he'd change his behavior.
By your logic, we should sleep babies on their stomachs and not bother with car seats. After all, that's what dh and his first wife did when the boys were small. Lord knows, what was good enough for them is good enough for kids now. Why should I expect him to be any different with our girls than he was with his boys? BECAUSE OF WHAT WE'VE LEARNED!! That's why!!!
Usually, you make more sense than this.
Edited 9/30/2004 8:35 pm ET ET by grimalkinskeeper
I'm sorry, but you're not hearing me. . .No, my husband hasn't treated me disprespectfully for years.
Sometimes it just takes time to realize how selfish someone is. I have come to the conclusion that that is the crux of most of our issues. He wants life his way. He doesn't want someone telling him he can't smoke in his own house but there's so much research out there saying it's bad to smoke around kids that it shoudln't be an issue. He's just too damned selfish to do what is right. It's kind of hard to work with someone who is that selfish.
I also think he never wanted the girls. I think he never wanted them and he's taking it out on me that we have them as if I made him do something he didn't want to. He should have just said from the beginning he didn't want kids. I think we both would have been happier if we'd found someone else.
I think she was asking if your DH treated his former wife and his boys with the same disrespect that he has shown you. Usually, the best predication of future behavior is past behavior.
"Hasty conclusions are the mark of a fool" Sign in front of a church
Kristi
&nbs
If he never wanted the kids, then why is he applying for sole custody? Revenge?
&nbs
Damnation..is that where I heard it from?
My Dr Phil rant of the week..I was watching earlier this week and they ran a advertisement for a future show. It asked if any women felt they were not promoted at work because of their lack of financial/business sense. Hello? Do men just have an innate sense of financial sense because of their gentilia? Vaginas prevent business sense? It made me so mad.
Patriarchal Phil strikes again.
&nbs
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