Unique contributions to society

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2006
Unique contributions to society
1504
Thu, 10-19-2006 - 4:12pm

In another thread, the "unique" contributions of SAHM's were alluded to but it wasn't stated what they are. Let's play a game and find out what they are. First, pretend that as of tomorrow, all moms SAH and detail what will be missing from society then pretend that all moms go to work and detail what will be missing from society. I'm really curious as to what people think a world without SAHM's orWOHM's would look like.

If all the moms who SAH went to work then the library would move story hour to the evening and summer vacation bible school would be held in the evenings so that all kids can attend and not just the kids of SAHM's. Banks would likely shift their hours to later in the day and you'd see more 24 hour stores. I think there would be more home cooking style restaurants too. I think day care centers would improve because of increased demand.

If all moms who WOH suddenly SAH, you'd see fewer service industries around because moms could do things themselves instead of paying for them. The nursing shortage would be more of a shortage. We'd probably have a shortage of teachers too. There'd be fewer government services because there'd be less tax dollars to pay for them. I can't think of anything else right now.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:07pm
He wasn't? HE had less money too. Unless neither of you have a concept of "our" money but only "her" money and "his" money. That is what I don't get...how two people can share the same house and the same expenses and yet when there is less money coming in, the belt-tightening only applies to one person. When dh's company closed and he was between jobs (a couple months) we BOTH tightened our belts to an agreed-upon degree. I didn't keep on spending money exactly as before simply because my salary was unaltered. I've heard of this in one other marriage (hers/his money rather than "our" money) but it isn't the universal standard upon which many marriages operate. If this is your experience (as it is also kbamam's), this explains why you both have the "power struggle" model of marriage while others who have the "cooperation" model are baffled.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:10pm

Because I like supporting family-friendly businesses. I think of it as a "Put your money where your mouth is" concept. Besides, the kind of physician who would leave work to take care of a sick child shares some of my sense of priorities with me and I would tend to feel like I had more in common with that person and thus, I think I might get better care. (I think ease of doctor-patient relationship can contribute a lot to quality of care.)

Who's Ted Olson? Should I know? I still wear my Meadowwood baseball cap everywhere I go. No one here knows what that means though.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:13pm
So there's nothing "sad" about it. You are just being politically correct for a poster who doesn't know you well?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:13pm
Yup. I think some jobs are actually a detriment to society, regardless of the fact that they contribute to the GNP. Telemarketers specifically. Also political lobbyists. And papparazzi photographers.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:16pm
We care about a lot of things; power and control isn't one of them. We can easily care about where our money goes, how it is spent, etc without caring about having control or holding the power. We care about our house staying reasonably clean and neat; we don't care about how it gets that way or who controls who does what to get it that way. We care about raising our children to be mature, responsible adults; we don't care about one of us having more control in that area.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:18pm

Shoot, I could spend 10 hours a week or more on keeping my house really, really clean (which it isn't now, lol). Another 5-10 on improving it or doing projects. Another 5-10 on just doing "stuff" for/with the kids. Another 10-15 on pta stuff alone.

Sure, only 5-10 hours of that HAS to be done, but it's easy to find plenty of things to do to fill the time. My problem (and perhaps yours too) is that I don't like dong most of that stuff, so I had no motivation and sat around on my arse in a dirty house. That's why I wasn't a very good SAHM. I need more external motivation than SAH gives me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:19pm
My time as a parent is far more valuable than my time as an employee. But that's why I chose not to enter a field where I had to choose between my job or my kids.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:21pm
I specifically chose a ped clinic where there were multiple doctors and have made sure to have well-child and sick visits with 3 of the 6, just so that I don't have to be so particular. I'm comfortable with any of the three seeing and treating my child on any basis.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:21pm

>>So to you, if someone has a leisurely life, it means they do nothing?<<

i have no idea where you got that from what i posted.....you outlined what she doesn't do...she doesn't interact with the kids, she doesn't clean, she doesn't do this or that....so i was wondering what she does do. and what you pay her to do, rather than what you pay her not to do.

most nanny's duties require a lot more than what you require of yours. when i was searching for a nanny, they got paid (and paid well) to not just watch the kids, but interact, teach, etc, clean, iron, cook, run errands and a host of other things. for that i'd pay a person the going nanny rate to come in. but i wouldn't if all she did was sit back and make sure the kids didn't kill eachother. not worth my money.

but hey, its your money, do what you want with it.

>>I pay her for her availability<<

and you answered my question, thank you. again, its your money! if it works for you and yours, than its all gravy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 3:22pm
And if you really think that is the okay way to think about money in a marriage, one can see why SAH isn't an attractive option for you.

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