"We don 't believe in that [WOHM]"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2005
"We don 't believe in that [WOHM]"
2078
Mon, 01-09-2006 - 11:31am

On Friday, as I was driving hom from work, I stumbled across an interview with the wife of the one surviving miner from the collapse in WVa. In the course of the interview, someone asked her if she worked.

Her response was that they don't believe in that. She explained that her husband was very proud of the fact that he was the sole supporter of the family, and that he didn't need her help in supporting them. She explained that they just don't believe in women working after they have kids and husbands, and that they believe her place is at home with the kids.

My heart really goes out to her, and this post isn't about her, but about the sentiment that women shouldn't work because their place is at home. And being a real man, even if it means working in dangerous conditions, long hours, holding two jobs and being a step away from poverty at every turn, means that your wife doesn't work.

I suppose this is the first time that I've heard someone, not a movie character or a character in a book, express this sentiment. I don't understand why anyone would be proud to limit their spouse's potential. Or why be proud that you live right on the poverty line?

If they didn't see the dangers of their POV before, surely that entire community, and even the whole country, has now seen the risk that we talk about on here all the time, the risk that suddenly the SAHM will need to find a way to financially support the family. I wonder if anyone will re-think what they believe in.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005

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When do you hear that?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005
Thank you. Saved me a post and saved me trying to word it well.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005
But that wouldn't constitute probably cause to search that man's home. The cop in this instance would need a warrant to do that.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Actually, I don't mind "I stay home to raise my kids" a bit unless it is followed by "rather than letting some daycare/stangers/etc raise them for me." There's a difference between "I stay home to raise my kids" as a description of fact and the same thing said as a political statement. You can usually tell the difference right away as its being said IRL.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
It didn't work anyways. Apparently there is no difference between seeing someone driving recklessly and pulling them over, and wiretapping someone even though you don't have enough probable cause to get a warrant to do so.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
I have said since I first became a sahm that I sah for me. I dont for one second believe that my kids are better or worse off based on my work status. For me at this time it is easier to sah - plus I just hate looking for a job.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
As the mother to a 15 year old girl I have learned to look beyond the clothes. While I am not like alot of the things they wear, I dont have to wear them. I am in my daughters high school and at school functions quite a bit I have only seen a couple of things that I thought were inappropriate. But then baggy clothes and odd colored hair dont bother me either - while my child may not wear or do those things, I have learned that the kids that do are some of the nicest kids around.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
If two US Marshalls are guarding him, what's the problem?
Avatar for ahlmommy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Nuts isn't it....I can't even imagine it.
Avatar for ahlmommy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
That is pretty much how it is here...except for the occasional Batman, Spiderman t shirt...or whomever the current superhero is. My son wears a lot of khaki cargo pants and jeans. It is boring dressing him because he is a big kid. I have to buy jeans from Old Navy because they are the only ones that fit correctly.

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