"We don 't believe in that [WOHM]"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2005
"We don 't believe in that [WOHM]"
2078
Mon, 01-09-2006 - 11:31am

On Friday, as I was driving hom from work, I stumbled across an interview with the wife of the one surviving miner from the collapse in WVa. In the course of the interview, someone asked her if she worked.

Her response was that they don't believe in that. She explained that her husband was very proud of the fact that he was the sole supporter of the family, and that he didn't need her help in supporting them. She explained that they just don't believe in women working after they have kids and husbands, and that they believe her place is at home with the kids.

My heart really goes out to her, and this post isn't about her, but about the sentiment that women shouldn't work because their place is at home. And being a real man, even if it means working in dangerous conditions, long hours, holding two jobs and being a step away from poverty at every turn, means that your wife doesn't work.

I suppose this is the first time that I've heard someone, not a movie character or a character in a book, express this sentiment. I don't understand why anyone would be proud to limit their spouse's potential. Or why be proud that you live right on the poverty line?

If they didn't see the dangers of their POV before, surely that entire community, and even the whole country, has now seen the risk that we talk about on here all the time, the risk that suddenly the SAHM will need to find a way to financially support the family. I wonder if anyone will re-think what they believe in.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Trust is a separate issue. I just said that to you after thinking about it. Trust has absolutely nothing to do with waivering with discipline. I will say this again, if the nanny is human, she waivers.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005
Uhhhh yeah. 'Cause that's what I said. Riiiiight.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998

<< Unless those children are being cared for by Rosie the Robot (The Jetsons)I can promise you that discipline is waivered from time to time.>>


How do you know that?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2005

A dentist could change a diaper better than you could when you were a nanny?

What does medical treatment have to do with the job duties of a nanny?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005
And I don't agree with that. I don't change diapers better than a nanny, or a dc teacher, or my next door neighbor or maybe even the mailman. I'm not better qualified to care for each and every one of my child's. I provide more love and support, but that's not all that's entailed in "care". My cc providers met many of my child's needs as well as, or better than, I could. Did they do it with as much love? Nahhh, but I don't think love is necessary to change a diaper or mash up peas.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998

I don't get it either.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998

Perhaps a magic nanny cam?


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005
Not necessarily. She might waver on many many things. But PNJ didn't say she never wavered at all ... just that she never wavered on discipline. Discipline could be an area in which PNJ's nanny excels. But of course, you wouldn't know whether that's true or not becasue you've never met her. PNJ, on the other hand, is in a very good position to judge whether that might be true.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006

***How do you know that? Just because you know people that have had nannies waiver that equals that fact that all nannies everywhere waiver?***

No, it is because she is a human being. I would say everyone waivers in their job. I know I have. Haven't you waivered with something at your job at some point and time?

***It's quite a wide margin last time I saw the charts, do you know that it correlates with the number of hours spent with a nanny versus the number of hours that same child spends with the parents?***

What I meant by my statement is that their are a lot more children in this world that aren't with nanny's. All children have parents. Not all children have nanny's.

***It's very relevant to the debate here, unless of course you are saying that nannies are the only ones that can't be trusted without direct supervision?***

Well you were speaking to me about my DH. You asked me if I knew that my DH was at work when he said he was. He sees his boss daily. They are next door to each other everyday.

***Unless you have a video yourself, you may be wrong as well.***

To say a person doesn't waiver ever is really naive. JMHO.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2005

<>

Of course I've wavered at some parts of my job. But there are also some parts of my job on which I have NEVER wavered. Isn't is possible that discipline is one part of the nanny's job that she doesn't waver on?

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