were YOU a REBEL ;)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
were YOU a REBEL ;)
168
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 3:58pm

so i promised to back off the duggar debate but the feedback really does have me wondering.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:00pm
The only way I rebelled was dating older men, and it was because of my personality and nterests, not because my parents were strict or cautioned me against it.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:02pm

I was not a rebel at all. I did everything my parents asked of me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:10pm

it was because of my personality and nterests, not because my parents were strict or cautioned me against it.


thank you..these are exactly the words i was looking for.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:20pm
you must be the youngest.......J/K,RLGL !!! ;)

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:21pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:27pm

IMO, rebellion comes from a combination of a child's personality and his/her parents' style (which is personality, too).

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:32pm

First of all, rebelling is not bad in and of itself. A certain amount of rebellion is necessary to separate properly from your parents. OTOH, there is also destructive rebellion, IOW when it gets so extreme that kids either get into drugs or other dangers, or the separation is so difficult that the rebellious period ends up taking up too much time and energy for the kid's own good.

In my own experience, kids brought up in very strict homes were the ones who were more likely to get drunk at parties and stuff. My own rebellion consisted mostly of getting married young (considered very uncool by the rents).

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:33pm
I am actually the oldest!! :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:33pm

I rebelled in the same rather middle-of-the-road way that you did. But where we part ways is I don't see this as a bad thing for which blame should be assigned. I don't think anybody is to blame because blame implies that something bad has happened. And the middle-of-the-road rebellion that you describe is very healthy, typical and something that is just a part of the normal growth process for many people. As you say, "those extremities came from me and my own ionterest in discovering myself". It was the utterly normal, healthy rebellion that young people on the road to adulthood dabble in to get a handle on who they are. There is no need for blame because it isn't a negative thing that parents should fear and try to avoid. The parents didn't do anything wrong to make it happen. They did things right: stuck to middle-of-the-road parenting which led to middle-of the-road rebellion that is a normal part of self discovery in those whose personality tends that way (not everybody's does so not every noprmal, healthy kid does it).


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 4:53pm
Just to tag on to the end of your post, why do you think so many Gen X'ers blame their parents' career drives for their own nontraditional career paths?

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