were YOU a REBEL ;)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
were YOU a REBEL ;)
168
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 3:58pm

so i promised to back off the duggar debate but the feedback really does have me wondering.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 5:00pm
Honestly, I have never come across that. I have come across it once in a while in the older generation, the ones who were hippies. But even there, the ambitious ones tended to find a way for ambition to win out. They just chose avenues other than the standard doctor/lawyer road.
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 5:29pm
I do see children of baby boomers who want a different family-work balance than their parents had (or were perceived to have had). OTOH, they also seem to be accustomed to the nice stuff that went along with their parents' lifestyle.
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 5:39pm
I wasn't a rebel, but I think I could have been if my parents had been the authoritarian type. I suspect a combination of parenting and personality creates rebels. I don't think sah/woh has much to do with it, except perhaps at the extremes--parents who work so many hours they aren't paying attention or parents who are overly involved in their kids' lives and can't let them make decisions on their own.
Avatar for 4thekids2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 5:47pm

Nope, not

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 5:49pm

"Middle of the road" parenting in general

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 5:50pm

I don't think "blame" is the right word here, since in the various magazine articles I've read, the GenXers seem pretty happy with their choices. There's no reason to assign blame for something you're happy with. These magazine articles have the GenXers saying, rather, that they were influenced by their parents career drive because they saw their parents' unhappiness with the rat race they were stuck in (for those who were raised in the 70's like myself) and didn't want to be similarly stuck. Or they were raised in the 80's and saw the excess as its own kind of trap.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 6:40pm

I don't think parenting can be *blamed* for rebellion, but it certainly can exacerbate it.

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 6:42pm

I realize that you're kidding, but there is some truth to birth order.

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 6:47pm

rebelling is not bad in and of itself. A certain amount of rebellion is necessary to separate properly from your parents.


Perfectly natural, and necessary.


In my own experience, kids brought up in very strict homes were the ones who were more likely to get drunk at parties and stuff.


My experience was slightly different.

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Ducky

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 12-15-2008 - 8:48pm

I'm sure it does. My parents didn't do nearly as much in terms of helping with homework and school projects as dh and I do. But I do hear adults in their early 30s talking about how they want to spend more time on their families and less on their careers than their parents did.

Many of the students I work with with (who are properly millenials, not Gen X--most in their early to mid-20s) have a different approach to law school than my colleagues and I did in the 80s. I remember at a conference I attended a couple of years ago a presenter who talked about these generational differences, and how baby boomers could easily mistake the desire of today's students to have a better family-work balance for lack of ambition.

Good to see you! Hope the kiddos are all well.

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