I don't think that there are any universal duties, it really is up to the individual families to decide that.
We have pretty much always gone by the theory of who ever is in the home at the time takes care of what needs to be done. If he is in the home then he takes care of it, if I am then I do, if we both are then we both do. Since as SAHM I had much more time in the home then he did then more of the chores fell to me.
It really has not been much different when we both have been in the work force. When one is working more hours outside the home then the other takes on more chores in the home. When our work hours are more even then our chores become more even.
Without reading the other responses, my answer is that there are universal duties of parents. Job status doesn't change that. How the parents divide up the duties is totally up to them. Job status can be one of the many factors that parents take into account when doing the dividing.
However, in my personal opinion the person who is at home more (either SAH or PTWOH) should take on the lion's share of the home tasks. It seems unfair to have one partner WOH FT and then come home to a ton of household chores too.
I agree, which is why I believe that a SAHP should do the majority of the childcare and household duties since they are usually the one available to do it.
If my DH is at work 8 hours a day every weekday, and I'm only at work 5 hours a day two days a week, then it naturally becomes my duty to do the majority of the laundry, cooking, dishes, taking kids to the doctor, etc. Not all, by any means, but the majority.
I would say the at home parent usually ends up doing "most" but not nearly the vast majority of household tasks. Plus, the at home parent is generally "working" when the wohp is at "work". They are usually at home to be with the children, not to be the maid. For younger children, it is probably child care. For older children, it can be tutoring, driving, coordinating life... It is also being the one "on call" for sickness and other appointments.
I also think that it is important for EVERY member of the family does "chores" for the household. Each person is part of the family and thus each is responsible for the running of the household.
Plus, in these debates I frequently see posters not including some of the traditional "Dad"/Male duties. For example, yard work, car repair, bill paying, financial planning.....
"Plus, in these debates I frequently see posters not including some of the traditional "Dad"/Male duties. For example, yard work, car repair, bill paying, financial planning....."
I do more of the day to day chores but DH does more of the project type chore. Over the last few months he has painted our bathroom, the guest room, the exercise room and is in the process of painting DD3s bedroom. Projects he has lined up to do after that are replacing some wallboard in the garage, removing and replacing some damaged siding, repairing the ceiling in the laundry room where we had a leak.
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I don't think that there are any universal duties, it really is up to the individual families to decide that.
We have pretty much always gone by the theory of who ever is in the home at the time takes care of what needs to be done. If he is in the home then he takes care of it, if I am then I do, if we both are then we both do. Since as SAHM I had much more time in the home then he did then more of the chores fell to me.
It really has not been much different when we both have been in the work force. When one is working more hours outside the home then the other takes on more chores in the home. When our work hours are more even then our chores become more even.
Without reading the other responses, my answer is that there are universal duties of parents. Job status doesn't change that. How the parents divide up the duties is totally up to them. Job status can be one of the many factors that parents take into account when doing the dividing.
Chris
The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett
It totally depends on the family.
However, in my personal opinion the person who is at home more (either SAH or PTWOH) should take on the lion's share of the home tasks. It seems unfair to have one partner WOH FT and then come home to a ton of household chores too.
I don't think so, I think it would vary from family to family.
PumpkinAngel
I don't think there are duties that fall to one parent or the other based on work status.
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I agree, which is why I believe that a SAHP should do the majority of the childcare and household duties since they are usually the one available to do it.
If my DH is at work 8 hours a day every weekday, and I'm only at work 5 hours a day two days a week, then it naturally becomes my duty to do the majority of the laundry, cooking, dishes, taking kids to the doctor, etc. Not all, by any means, but the majority.
I would say the at home parent usually ends up doing "most" but not nearly the vast majority of household tasks. Plus, the at home parent is generally "working" when the wohp is at "work". They are usually at home to be with the children, not to be the maid. For younger children, it is probably child care. For older children, it can be tutoring, driving, coordinating life... It is also being the one "on call" for sickness and other appointments.
I also think that it is important for EVERY member of the family does "chores" for the household. Each person is part of the family and thus each is responsible for the running of the household.
Plus, in these debates I frequently see posters not including some of the traditional "Dad"/Male duties. For example, yard work, car repair, bill paying, financial planning.....
Edited 3/4/2010 2:05 pm ET by tryingtoquit
"Plus, in these debates I frequently see posters not including some of the traditional "Dad"/Male duties. For example, yard work, car repair, bill paying, financial planning....."
I do more of the day to day chores but DH does more of the project type chore. Over the last few months he has painted our bathroom, the guest room, the exercise room and is in the process of painting DD3s bedroom. Projects he has lined up to do after that are replacing some wallboard in the garage, removing and replacing some damaged siding, repairing the ceiling in the laundry room where we had a leak.
I was going to mention in my original post that pre-kids, DH and I fell into the traditional gender roles.
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