What do SAHMs do all day?

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
What do SAHMs do all day?
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Mon, 10-14-2013 - 3:59pm

It was a question such as this that prompted  the male author to write the following article in the Huffington post.  He is tired of working moms of putting down his wife because she is SAH: 

Look, I don't cast aspersions on women who work outside of the home. I understand that many of them are forced into it because they are single mothers, or because one income simply isn't enough to meet the financial needs of their family. Or they just choose to work because that's what they want to do. Fine. I also understand that most "professional" women aren't rude, pompous and smug, like the two I met recently.

But I don't want to sing Kumbaya right now. I want to kick our backwards, materialistic society in the shins and say, "GET YOUR FREAKING HEAD ON STRAIGHT, SOCIETY."

This conversation shouldn't be necessary. I shouldn't need to explain why it's insane for anyone -- particularly other women -- to have such contempt and hostility for "stay at home" mothers. Are we really so shallow? Are we really so confused? Are we really the first culture in the history of mankind to fail to grasp the glory and seriousness of motherhood? The pagans deified Maternity and turned it into a goddess. We've gone the other direction; we treat it like a disease or an obstacle.

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/matt-walsh/youre-a-stay-at-home-mom-_b_4086126.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular
I also found the last couple of paragraphs interesting, he was talking about how it doesn't matter who is busier and why we try to keep score.
Any thoughts on the article?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Tue, 10-15-2013 - 7:10pm

You're older than me bord. Do you think we're a more materialistic society now than when you were a kid? Just curious, Thanks." I don't know. Certainly we have a generally higher standard of living now in terms of creature comfort. When I was a kid we had one shared phone and one shared bathroom and one shared car and one shared television for the entire family. Even if we had been middle class, which we were not, we would have lived less well than we do now. But we were still a greed, materialistic, possession-oriented society. The phrase "keeping up with the Jones" had been invented. I think materialism is a human failing whenever there is excess. Just got done with a Bible Study on the Book of Deuteronomy about it, as a matter of fact..

lol. I have that now (minus the cell phones) but had all of that when I was a kid. We weren't poor either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Tue, 10-15-2013 - 7:42pm
I'm confused. You have what now, Morty?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Tue, 10-15-2013 - 8:35pm

One shared phone and one shared bathroom

Avatar for savcal2011
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Registered: 10-06-2010
Tue, 10-15-2013 - 9:43pm

bordwithyou wrote:
"You're older than me bord. Do you think we're a more materialistic society now than when you were a kid? Just curious, Thanks." I don't know. Certainly we have a generally higher standard of living now in terms of creature comfort. When I was a kid we had one shared phone and one shared bathroom and one shared car and one shared television for the entire family. Even if we had been middle class, which we were not, we would have lived less well than we do now. But we were still a greed, materialistic, possession-oriented society. The phrase "keeping up with the Jones" had been invented. I think materialism is a human failing whenever there is excess. Just got done with a Bible Study on the Book of Deuteronomy about it, as a matter of fact..

I think I agree.  We didn't have HD tvs, or Xbox games, or cell phones, or SUVs "way back when" -- but that wasn't because we weren't materialistic. It's because those things didn't exist.  It was materialistic to have a tv, or wear a strand of pearls, etc, etc.  The importance of possession was still there -- it's just the possessions that were different.

Shoot, just look at the royalty and nobility in history - they were most defintely greedy and materialistic. 

"I don’t mind a banshee, that’s fine. 2 banshees? I HATE you. I actually wish bad things upon you." -- Day[9] Daily #459 P1

Avatar for savcal2011
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Registered: 10-06-2010
Tue, 10-15-2013 - 9:44pm

mortyswife wrote:
<p><strong>One shared phone and one shared bathroom</strong></p>

You and you dh and/or kids don't have cell phones?

 

Man, I was on a party line as a kid.  Our ring was two shorts. My grandmother's ring was two longs. The neighbor's ring was one short/one long. 

"I don’t mind a banshee, that’s fine. 2 banshees? I HATE you. I actually wish bad things upon you." -- Day[9] Daily #459 P1

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 10-15-2013 - 10:24pm

<< But I think it is a reality for some people to excuse away working for "things", I know nobody that stays at home for things but some - even on this board - have said SAH is a selfish choice, prehaps there are some similarities there...>>

Given that you have chosen to go back to work, multiple times throughout the years that is an interesting statement...perhaps a view in the mirror?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Tue, 10-15-2013 - 10:27pm

jamblessedthree wrote:
<p>Lol thardy, I don't miss those early years at home.  Perhaps the feet up eating bon bons are where the "its all about me" comes from, I can't say I live like that, I'd hit the gym before doing that. </p>

Interesting....is wasn't that long ago that both you and thardy were talking about how easy being a sahm was...

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Tue, 10-15-2013 - 10:37pm
If you all have cell phones you are hardly making do with one telephone. We have no landline and no televisions at all, but I think we are unusual in that. I think most middle class Americans have most of the things I listed.
Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 5:59am

mortyswife wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px">You're older than me bord. Do you think we're a more materialistic society now than when you were a kid? Just curious, Thanks." I don't know. Certainly we have a generally higher standard of living now in terms of creature comfort. When I was a kid we had <strong>one shared phone and one shared bathroom</strong> and one shared car and one shared television for the entire family. Even if we had been middle class, which we were not, we would have lived less well than we do now. But we were still a greed, materialistic, possession-oriented society. The phrase "keeping up with the Jones" had been invented. I think materialism is a human failing whenever there is excess. Just got done with a Bible Study on the Book of Deuteronomy about it, as a matter of fact..</span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">lol. I have that now (minus the cell phones) but had all of that when I was a kid. We weren't poor either.</span></strong></p>

We shared one phone and one bathroom too.  Our bedrooms were dormer style, my brothers on one side of the upstairs and my sisters and I on the other side, Lol.  I don't think there was the keeping up like there is today, maybe there was but I didn't see it.  I guess we were middle class, dad's school teacher salary wasn't a lot but I didn't grow up deprived. 

 

 

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 6:00am
So what are you saying savcal.. if there was hdtv, xbox, suvs then you would have had them? Weren't you poor?

 

 

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