What do SAHMs do all day?

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
What do SAHMs do all day?
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Mon, 10-14-2013 - 3:59pm

It was a question such as this that prompted  the male author to write the following article in the Huffington post.  He is tired of working moms of putting down his wife because she is SAH: 

Look, I don't cast aspersions on women who work outside of the home. I understand that many of them are forced into it because they are single mothers, or because one income simply isn't enough to meet the financial needs of their family. Or they just choose to work because that's what they want to do. Fine. I also understand that most "professional" women aren't rude, pompous and smug, like the two I met recently.

But I don't want to sing Kumbaya right now. I want to kick our backwards, materialistic society in the shins and say, "GET YOUR FREAKING HEAD ON STRAIGHT, SOCIETY."

This conversation shouldn't be necessary. I shouldn't need to explain why it's insane for anyone -- particularly other women -- to have such contempt and hostility for "stay at home" mothers. Are we really so shallow? Are we really so confused? Are we really the first culture in the history of mankind to fail to grasp the glory and seriousness of motherhood? The pagans deified Maternity and turned it into a goddess. We've gone the other direction; we treat it like a disease or an obstacle.

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/matt-walsh/youre-a-stay-at-home-mom-_b_4086126.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular
I also found the last couple of paragraphs interesting, he was talking about how it doesn't matter who is busier and why we try to keep score.
Any thoughts on the article?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 10:10am

bordwithyou wrote:
If you all have cell phones you are hardly making do with one telephone. We have no landline and no televisions at all, but I think we are unusual in that. I think most middle class Americans have most of the things I listed.

We do have a landline and cellphones, but only one television..and its not a flat screen, but we muddle through life.  ;)

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 10:16am

jamblessedthree wrote:
So what are you saying savcal.. if there was hdtv, xbox, suvs then you would have had them? Weren't you poor?

We only had one tv growing up too, interesting that I have patterned that after my own childhood, I think.  We didn't have video games, despite them starting to come out when I was a teen, remember Pong and Atari?  

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 10:18am

jamblessedthree wrote:
Psst morty, DD1 woke up extra early this morning.. When I asked her what the hurry was she said she needed to be at school by 7 for a practice psat..... OMG, I never knew but I got her up there on time, that's my mommy contribution for the day, Lol.

OH I'm sure that Morty won't admonish you for not knowing about your dds psat, bias debating and all, so no worries!  I wonder if you will get the lecture that I received about taking the test during the school day...hmm, magic 8 ball says...  :)  

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 10:20am

jamblessedthree wrote:
<p> I'm not surprised some see horse/horseback riding as high society, Major players and dignitaries own their own ya know.  My husband's family is far from that and they owned two (maybe three over the course of his childhood).   They know much more about them than you or anybody that just borrowed a horse for status or kicks. </p><p> </p><p> </p>

It's an expensive sport and/or hobby, even if one isn't a major player, it's simply a fact that horses are expensive to feed and care for...

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 10:25am

thardy2001 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">bordwithyou</em> wrote:</div>  My kids took lessons/rode for awhile.  Then when my kid was about twelve, and beginning to compete, the instructor tells me, "He really needs his own horse.   One can only go "so far" on school horses."  My response:  "Then that's how far he's going."  He had no more than a passing desire for his own horse, and his father and I had no interest whatsoever in becoming horse owners.  I still don't know how he talked us into a dog.&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>Very wise.  If they are really interested in pursuing it, they will find a way.  A LOT of moms here drop their kids off in daycare or school while waltzing in wearing their jodhpurs. @@  Of course, they're not even going riding until after the kids get home, lol!  It's all a little transparent here. <img src="/forums/sites/all/libraries/tinymce/jscripts/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/img/smiley-smile.gif" alt="Smile" title="Smile" border="0" /></p>

How is that you know what a lot of mothers are wearing when they drop off their children at daycare?  Is wearing jodhpurs a lot like wearing the tennis skirt there too?

PumpkinAngel

Avatar for rollmops2009
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Registered: 02-24-2009
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 11:20am
"His Mom came from a fairly well-do-do family in Southport, CT; his father from a middle class bordering on upper middle class family. His father was much more into appearances than the mother." -------- Yep! I always found it sort of amusing growing up. My dad would make quite the show of not caring, yet he clearly cared - a lot. My mom, OTOH, truly could give a flying (and her dad was and sister is the same way). At the same time, of course, nobody would ever wonder where mom's people belonged in the scheme of things, which could explain why it didn't/doesn't occur to them to worry about it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 7:23pm

You and you dh and/or kids don't have cell phones?

One home phone (since that is what I thought we were originally speaking of)-dh, myself and dd have cellphones, ds does not.

Man, I was on a party line as a kid.  Our ring was two shorts. My grandmother's ring was two longs. The neighbor's ring was one short/one long. 

Nope, did not have that when I was a kid. I got a phone in my bedroom, still the same # as the home phone though when I was about 15.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 7:25pm

If you all have cell phones you are hardly making do with one telephone.

True but if we were going back to when we were kids, we still only have one landline # in our home AND one physical phone.

We have no landline and no televisions at all, but I think we are unusual in that. I think most middle class Americans have most of the things I listed.

You have no TV or just no cable? 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 7:27pm

I didn't "conclude" she had one shared bathroom and one shared phone.  I asked, and that's what she said.  We asked about cell phones but she hasn't responded yet.

I was busy with a field trip to the Bronx Zoo today Laughing

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 7:29pm

Psst morty, DD1 woke up extra early this morning.. When I asked her what the hurry was she said she needed to be at school by 7 for a practice psat..... OMG, I never knew but I got her up there on time, that's my mommy contribution for the day, Lol.

Bawahhaaa....Saturday is the day for us lol

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